Cruisair

Memories of the first bear

2011-06-30T18:25:00.001+02:00

Today, somehow I remembered that in my youth I was a member of the photo club of my hometown Cologne. I enjoyed going there a lot though being the shy child that I am I did not dare to go alone and always went there with my friends from school.
When I started to look if the club still exists and has an internet presence I started remembering more things. I found the club and browsed their site, to see if I still could remember more things when maybe seeing names. I recognized one name but I cannot recall the person. However, I do remember that back then during my membership I was fascinated by the guy who was the responsible for the "youth". He was a true bear from what I remember now! I wonder, did it have any influence on my taste in men since at that early stage I was intrigued by this man? I looked on the site but I could not remember his name nor did I recognize anything. A pity, I would love to see him back, see if he still is a bear... I don't even know if he was gay but for sure I was totally fascinated by his masculine bearish appearance, the full beard, the hairy chest... ;) Those are sweet memories, I'm torn between investigating more or letting it rest in the past and my memory. ;)
In any case, I'm still attracted to photography and bears, amongst other things. :)

...it never happens to me.

2010-05-21T15:17:00.000+02:00

Picture this: you're sitting in the train, on your way to work, a 20 minute ride. Then, across you on the other side of the aisle, a young punk-ish twenty-ish guy takes a seat. The guy is somehow interesting to look at because of his style. While looking you finally realize that the guy has one hand in his trousers - yes, in his crotch! You start wondering if he suffers from lice or maybe is just re-arranging the "contents"... and while keeping watching you confirm to yourself that indeed he has a hard-on hidden in his trousers! And yes, he is playing with himself, while you keep watching! Of course, you decide not to look any other way but keep looking! And he keeps playing... and there's your stop, you exit the train to go to work.

Well, this did not happen to me but to a good friend. Such things never happen to me. I wonder how I would react if it'd ever happen. Maybe it's how I appear towards others that this would (n)ever happen to me. And I don't even know whether it's something I should be sad about missing...? I guess to experience the "excitement" and being "attractive" to someone else (even for such a purpose as simply being an audience) is cool since it's out of the ordinary (somehow)? How about you, have you had such experiences? How did you like it, how did you react?

Freedom

2010-05-05T21:16:00.001+02:00

This evening by chance we switched on the tv and there was a documentary by dutch television about canadian students who were coming to the Netherlands to commemorate the liberation of the Netherlands by the canadian forces on May 5th, 1945, some 65 years ago.
It was an interesting program and I felt intrigued and I kept watching. I was surprised to learn about the canadian students' plan to visit Holland. They "adopt" an individual soldier who gave his life in the war to fight for freedom and liberty and against the very same people I am a descendant from. It deeply impressed me that those young Canadians were so dedicated to honor these men by visiting their graves in Holland. While watching the program I surely shed a tear 'cause it deeply touched me. I felt very emotional about Holland's national holiday today.

Yesterday, during my shift at the airport, at 20.00 hours there were two minutes of silence to remember those who gave their lives. I always find it extremely touching to experience how a normally busy airport completely falls in silence and no one moves or says something. It always gives me shivers and honestly I have to fight tears 'cause I find it very emotional when they end the two minutes with playing the dutch national anthem. I don't know why it strikes me so deeply, but I know it does.

How lucky I am and thankful I should be for living here and now. I should think about this more often and come to realize how little and insignificant my personal individual daily problems are. I should cherish the freedom I have, in every way.

Happiness comes easy

2010-04-25T22:59:00.002+02:00

Today, Jelle and I took a little walk around the neighbourhood. Jelle returned from the gym and off we went for our little walk. At first we walked to the station (which is close-by) as I had to load my electronic rail card with new data at the ticket machine. I also charged the card with some money so I can use the card as an electronic ticket for my ride to work as well. Jelle already had done that but I was a bit reluctant to do it... going through the procedure on internet first wasn't high on my priority list. But Jelle and our friend Erwin convinced me of the advantage.
Then we continued our walk through our neighbourhood but not before we stopped at the BP gas station to grab an icecream: Jelle had the new Magnum Gold (which wasn't spectacular according to him but of course he fell for the advertising and the fact that it was supposed to look gold...) while I had a "simple" Solera Exotic, very yummy! The weather outside was very pleasant and the icecream was a nice complement. Anyway, we continued our walk, passing by Jelle's gym which he finally showed me. Now I know where to find him should I need to (as he never takes his phone there). We continued, passed by a Lebanese restaurant that we noticed quite a while ago but haven't tried out yet. It looks very inviting and we hope to try it out some day with our friends (Dani, get up here!!!). We continued, passed by a neighboring district, saw some newbuildings and some still being under construction and we realized how long ago it was that we passed here with our bikes as we hadn't really noticed these changes! We returned into our neighborhood and we kept talking about this and that and shortly before reaching our home we passed a building in which a colleague and friend lives. We hadn't seen him for a while and while passing along the doors I was wondering which door it was 'cause I couldn't remember. Jelle knew and we hadn't really finished talking about it that suddenly we heard someone behind us shouting. We turned and guess who it was: our friend had just left home to go to the airport to fly to work (yes, he works for the same company as we do). So of course it was immediately a happy "Hello" and kisses and smiles! So instead of going home we accompanied him to the train station again all the way chatting and updating ourselves about the last news. We dropped him at the station and Jelle and I returned finally home debating on the chances that we would meet him now and there...
I finally came to the conclusion that things like this make me happy: meeting a friend, receiving a smile, knowing that someone else is happy to see me too... I also arranged today to meet another friend next weekend and all that made me happy and thankful. Happiness does come easy sometimes.

The ideal flight

2010-04-24T15:37:00.000+02:00

Here's a question to those of you who are - like me - interested in civil aviation: the other day I was talking with my Jelle about airlines and planes and previous journeys we made, sharing some beautiful memories. At that point I was thinking how the ideal flight would look to me, based on my personal experience so far. I came up with the following: the flight should be with an Airbus A380, with a business class configuration like Emirates Airline has, with an inflight catering/meal service that equals at least that of Etihad and Qatar Airways, with an inflight entertainment system like Emirates uses in Business Class on its Airbus A380 and with the crew (flight attendants/pilots) from Lufthansa. To me, that would be the ideal combination.
So, how does YOUR ideal flight look like?

Desire

2010-01-17T22:00:00.003+01:00

There it was again: a beautiful face. This time I saw it on tv but it can show up anywhere. The beautiful face of a man - not a particular one but simply someone I see and like. It can be mature, it can be young. Usually it's a bearded face but not always. Actually, I don't even know how to describe what makes it beautiful: facial hair for me for sure (like a stubbly beard will do), but it can also just be the twinkle in his eyes, the colors of the eyes, the simple but honest smile... single little things could make it qualify for the title "beautiful", the sum of the little things sure is a guarantee for it.

Then, with that face, comes the urge to touch it, feel it, maybe even be allowed to give it a gentle or passionate kiss. My mind starts building those huge fantasy worlds of how it would be... those thoughts of exploring, of discovery.

But then, the program on tv continues, the man on the streets passes by without returning my glance, the fantasy worlds collapse, the daily routine returns.

Yet, all that remains is desire. The desire to be with him, the desire to know how it feels to receive what I would love to give. But that'll be all I ever get: a glance at what I missed many years ago, what I never had, never will.

I rely on the man in my life, my hubby whom I love, a rock in stormy sea, a safe harbour.

Only sometimes that flame of desire flares up a little when I see it: that beautiful face...

Tragedy

2009-11-12T05:35:00.004+01:00

Yesterday I was touched by the death of the german goalkeeper Robert Enke, aged 32. He took his life by jumping before a train. It was said he was depressed and never overcame the death of his daughter (2.5 years). He leaves his wife and an eight month old adopted daughter behind.

I think it's a tragedy that no one could help this man to overcome his grief for his child. It's a pity the only way out for him was to find the way to his deceased daughter. It was heartbreaking to see his wife on tv giving a press conference - amazing how strong that woman was, how she spoke of their hopes to overcome the loss of their daughter with their love for each other that as she said glued them even more together. Sadly, it was not enough for Robert.

Twitter?

2009-11-04T11:12:00.000+01:00

I don't get it: what is the whole world loving about twitter? Yeah sure, I'm on there too. Until recently, I was even twittering publicly. But I decided to go private since I have unknown people following me and I simply don't like that idea and can't get used to it. Why would anybody who doesn't know me at all be interested in what I twitter? That's weird. So I threw out all unknown followers and went private. To come back to the beginning: what's the big deal about twitter? To me it seems like it's a sort facebook but reduced to status updates and public. But since I'm on facebook too it seems odd to update there and on twitter? And updating on FB and twitter differently is even more strange, why would I do that? The possibility of interaction with followers seems less attractive to me on twitter than on FB. Following a "discussion" with multiple comments seems easier to me on FB than on twitter. But maybe that's not the idea of twitter? So for me twitter at the moment is not attractive. I reduce my activity there. I stopped following most people since most of them didn't twitter anyway or very seldom and/or are (more) active on FB as well (so that's easy...hahaha).
If someone can explain the whole twitter idea to me, go ahead and tell me.

Dubai Fountain

2009-09-27T01:33:00.002+02:00

Dubai Fountain
Originally uploaded by CruisAir

I've recently paid a short visit to the exciting city of Dubai. Here's a short video of one of the spectacular sights of the city, the Dubai Fountain. The sound and music you hear is that played during the performance, nothing has been added by me. The clashing sound you here is that of the water. It is an impressive show and they perform several a night, though they all seem to be alternating and different in length and music and lights. An amazing spectacular!
The building that can be seen in the background is the Burj Dubai. It's filmed from the bridge that connects Soukh al Bahar with the Dubai Mall.
Sorry for the inferior quality but I only have the possibility to record video with my Nikon Coolpix camera. But I guess it gives a good impression on how the fountain looks.

Emotional

2009-09-23T17:40:00.004+02:00

There is this Whitney Houston song playing in my head all afternoon..., the lyrics "... I get so emotional baby, every time I think of youuuhuuuu..." going through my head. It strangely feels like a soundtrack though I don't know the lyrics at all except for that part I mentioned which keeps repeating in my head... like those annoying songs from time to time that simply stuck in your head without obvious reason... Does this happen to you as well, that you feel much more emotional on one day than the other? I can't think of any specific reason why I am like this today... but I am. The slightest thing touches me and I almost feel like crying aobut little things that I hear when we talked. Today is such a day that I physically miss you a lot, to hug and feel that very special and dear friend, to feel some warmth. I feel like I soak up every little piece of love, warmth, appreciation like a dry sponge. Usually it's not "thaaaat bad"... I can keep up my mood pretty well I think. But obviously there are days for whatever reason that I'm less perfect. Like today. Sure, I have my hubby and we are doing very well. Yet, there are things I miss. There's a deep desire for warmth, ..., love and all kinds of other attention, like nice words. For example, I wish I'd one day hear words of being desired too, like you speak of others. Not necessarily from you but to experience such a sensation of being desired. I sometimes get a hint of that on flickr but it does not feel real and is far away. But I think a lot about such things, wondering how certain things I never experienced in my life could be. I can't remember ever being desired by someone, physically. With passion. Not that you can do anything about it. But you know me and what I talk about. Sometimes I think I travelled my life in one big circle and somehow feel I haven't moved forward one single step since the end of 2007 in certain ways. Of course there have been positive changes for me, luckily. But other things haven't changed and I wonder if they ever will? Can you still change certain things at my age? Can you make up for things of which you think you missed them? Did I really miss them, anyway? Is it enough for me to soak up your stories about such things, to hear your "wild" stories and think of my "possibly missed opportunities"? I am thankful for having my hubby by my side. I need him and he is important. But as great as he is he can't change my shortcomings.

...and still all I hear is that "...I get so emotional baby..."

Paris.

2009-08-10T08:00:00.001+02:00

Another recent trip took Jelle and me to Paris! It had been very long since our last trip to this beautiful city and so we were looking forward to a re-visit very much. Colleagues had been to the city by Thalys train and inspired us to try the same - so we did! And I must say we liked it a lot! We managed to get a special offer in First Class and that's really great travelling! During the trip you have free access to Wifi and they constantly serve you drinks, snacks and between Brussels and Paris even a full cold meal, like in an airplane! We loved it.

In Paris we had picked a very nice luxurious hotel, the Pullman Bercy. The location was not in the center but nevertheless close to the metro and very quiet and convenient. It is located near to a little park in Bercy and next to a small mall that was build in renovated industrial buildings. It was very cozy with lots of restaurants and all the shops and many people, you could hardly tell there's a economic crisis going on... We were very lucky with the weather and enjoyed a nice dinner outside in that mall.
We didn't have specific plans for sightseeing as we both had already been to the city before. We just walked around without plan and enjoyed all the impressions of a fascinating city. Though in the end we came by all the typical sights, like Notre Dame, Champs Elysée, Arc de Triomphe, Montmartre, Sacre Coeur and Eiffel Tower. We made some detours on our walk through one or the other park and also visited some of the many train stations the city has as we always find it interesting to visit stations.
After only two nights our visit ended already and we headed back to Amsterdam, again with the Thalys.
Jelle and I really enjoyed trip and city a lot and plan to go back.

Two trips.

2009-08-04T10:51:00.004+02:00

Recently I have taken two trips (again) to Spain. I have been to Madrid alone to visit Dani during Orgullo Gay. It was a very busy visit. Dani met some people on several occasions as he is a very social man. The parade in Madrid is nice, it again seemed to me like one big party of gay and straight people. I liked it. Personally though I think it's too long. It was nice to have the opportunity to meet Javier, one of Dani's dear friends, during this trip for the first time.

The second trip took Jelle and me to Valencia. Sera, Dani's boyfriend, had invited us to visit him and Dani during one weekend. So Jelle and I flew down there and joined the two. It was a very nice, calm and relaxed weekend. Sera and Dani showed us around and Jelle and I truly fell in love with the city! It's beautiful! Everything was perfect: the weather was hot but gorgeous, we had a splendid hotel that Sera had arranged and we truly enjoyed walking around the city and chatting with our friends and absorbing the impressions of sounds and sights of that fascinating city.
Unfortunately we had to leave early as it was a very busy travel weekend and all flights were pretty full. In order to make sure to get home we had to head home early but luckily the flights worked out fine for us. We decided to take a flight with Iberia Regional to Lisbon and from there with TAP to Amsterdam. Especially the TAP flight was very pleasant and despite having a very long return trip it still was interesting as Jelle had never flown them before.

uninspired.

2009-07-21T00:33:00.003+02:00

I'm sorry for not posting here lately - but I simply feel empty in the sense that I cannot find the right words to write about what moves me lately, about things that I could share here or whether it makes sense at all to post something here. It did in the past though and I guess it'll still make sense in the future but at the moment I don't really feel inspired. I'm not abandoning it and I also wouldn't call it a break but I simply feel I will only post things that really matter in some way to me rather than littering my blog with boring stuff.
Hugs,
Guido

lilbro's surprise for me!

2009-06-03T00:55:00.055+02:00

Me and Dani's gift
Originally uploaded by CruisAir

A few days ago, early morning, I was just up, the door bell rang and the postman had a small package for me: a gift by my beloved lilbro! He had made a book with all the photos of our trip to Japan and he gave it as a gift to me and on that mentioned morning it arrived! Just like that, as a surprise, isn't that fantastic?!

I am so happy, it is really beautiful, thank you so much lilbro! All the wonderful memories come back to my mind and it makes me extremely happy to think of all the good times we had, it was a fantastic trip and this book is a perfect way to remember it and share it with others! Looking at it makes me want to start planning the "sequel" with you lilbro. I wish I could share it here with you, my readers, but one can only really appreciate the efforts he put in it and the beauty of it when taking it in your hands and physically turn the pages.

I have shown it to several colleagues already and they all liked it very much! But their appreciation is nothing compared to mine. I am so proud of my lilbro, of our trip, of the book and I am truly thankful to you for showing me so much of that beautiful country Dani. Without you, I would never have seen all the beauty this country has to offer.

In moments that I feel a bit sad without really having a reason I can think of our trip and look at the book and all the beautiful memories come back and the warmth of love and harmony comes back and wraps around me like the warm blanket that I sometimes need. You haven't told me but I know it's a very special book, a magical gift to me.

Thank you, a thousand kisses and hugs, my beloved lilbro! That's by far never enough to thank you for it, but I hope you accept it as a first down payment on my debt ;)

My trip with Dani to Japan: a video summary by Dani.

2009-06-02T00:39:00.000+02:00

Today, I would like to share a video with you. It is very precious to me for several reasons: my lilbro Dani made it and it is a beautiful and stunning summary of our vacation in Japan. In my eyes, he captured the true spirit of our holiday: the harmony between us, how we enjoyed the exotic destination, the beauty of the country and its people, how we had fun, how we laughed, how we enjoyed to discover all the things we came across daily! He managed to put all our excitement and joy into this beautiful short video. When I watch it I do remember all the moments, all beautiful emotions I associate with the images come back and I really do enjoy that. It feels like reliving the holiday with Dani again. I hope you all like it as much as I do. Please enjoy.

Thank you Dani, my beloved lilbro, for making this wonderful video. It's a gem and a wonderful surprise you gave me.

It makes me very happy.

Woof Metal Alchemist

2009-04-28T00:01:00.000+02:00

On the "Woof - bear blog" I saw this video posted and I loved the accompanying title :)

I had to share it here since I know some of you like the Full Metal Alchemist manga... :)

Wrestling bears

2009-04-27T01:24:00.000+02:00

I always say I'm not into sports at all - but when I look at these men, I seriously start developing an interest for wrestling! :)

Hairspray on the Seven Seas!

2009-04-25T20:17:00.003+02:00

This is AWESOME: Royal Caribbean will have "Hairspray" as one of two shows on the brand new mega cruise ship Oasis of the Seas which will join the fleet end of this year:

I can't believe it, it's amazing, I can't wait to go see it, both ship and show :D

Happy Easter 2009

2009-04-11T20:52:00.000+02:00

Happy Easter 2009!

Here, have a million dollars.

2009-03-31T00:02:00.001+02:00

"You have to give away a million dollars."

Wow. That's easily answered you would think, right? Well, at least I thought so in the first instance. But then, when I started to think about the details I couldn't exactly figure it out. Of course you start thinking "I have to give to charity". After all, people look at you and your answer and most probably expect that. But then it get's difficult: what charity? But then again, what do I care about others? It's my money supposedly and I can decide what I do with it.

Suppose there are no restrictions in how I give away the money:

What I knew right away was that I would split the amount: Of course I would give some of it to my parents. Then another part would go to my friend Katja. Many years ago I made a deal with her: should I ever win the lottery I would give her part of that. I made the same promise to my lilbro, he would get a significant (bigger than Katja's) amount as well. I would also make sure a small part would go to my ex Klaus, he is a great guy but always short of money. For him a monthly transfer of a certain amount over a longer period would be nice. Then, of course I would make sure there is a big amount for my hubby. I would want him to have a financial safety net. A little is left now for charity. I don't exactly know what charity it would be but I think I would like it to be some gay project. I would have to investigate what kind of gay projects I would consider worthy receiving some money. So I wouldn't save the planet, environment, kids or animals with it. No, it should be something to help other gays.

So, here's how I would split it up:
Mom and Dad 200000
Katja 100000
Lilbro 200000
my ex 100000
my hubby 300000
charity 100000

Well, it's definitely not spectacular but I like the idea that I could give some money to my loved ones. They are dear to me. I could see the money go to a good cause and not disappear in an anonymous giant charity organization.

Suppose this split up of the money and giving it to family/friends would not be allowed:

I can see this alternative: I would set up a trust that gets the full amount. The members of the trust who decide what charity receives money from it would be (guess who) my mom and Dad, Katja, lilbro, Klaus and Jelle.

So this would be my million dollar spree. How would your's look like?

Trip of a lifetime: going to Japan with Dani.

2009-03-27T00:01:00.005+01:00

Dani and me in a typical yukata provided by our hotel during our stay.

Beginning of March I had the privilege of taking a trip to Japan with my beloved lilbro Dani. Let me give you a short trip report of our holiday. I can summarize the overall impression of this trip in one word: unforgettable!

A few months ago we had the idea of making a short visit to Japan. After all, it's Dani's passion and if you know him you know how much he loves the country, the language, it's culture. When going to work I passed a small advertisement stand at the airport which was of the city of Tokyo where I picked up some info material, amongst it a flyer of the Tokyo Anime Fair. Around this event we would eventually build our little trip which ended up being two weeks long. ;-) We also soon decided this would be a trip just for the „brothers“ that we are, the soulmates, without our beloved hubbies. They would stay at home this time.

Dani and Sera saying Goodbye at the airport in Madrid

I had been to Tokyo in 1987 for the first (and last) time but I barely remembered something of the city. So I gladly enjoyed Dani's planning for our trip, trusting his expertise as he had been to Japan two years ago – anywhere we'd go would be new for me. Dani's plan would bring us to Kyoto, Okinawa and Tokyo from where we would make excursions to several places of interest for us.

Dani onboard the Lufthansa Airbus in Business Class

So, on a friday morning, I left Amsterdam and flew to Frankfurt where I would check-in at the Sheraton Hotel right across from the terminal building, store the luggage and proceed straight to the next flight, one from Frankfurt to Madrid where I would pick up my lilbro in the afternoon. We both returned to Frankfurt the same evening and stayed at hotel. The next day, saturday, our Lufthansa flight would take us to Osaka (of course we travelled in style in business class) and from there we took our first train ride during this fabulous holiday to get to our hotel for the next days, a traditional japanese Ryukan in Kyoto.

One of the Shinkansen trains we travelled on.

From our base at Kyoto we made fantastic and very interesting excursions with trains (either local or one of the many variants of the Shinkansen) to Nara, to Hiroshima, to Osaka, to Miyajima and to Fushimi. These places were all different and yet so fascinating. If I had to name a favorite, it would be really difficult. For some reason I tend to like Fushimi very much, I can't really tell why. But Miyajima was also very beautiful and it is also considered to be one of the three most scenic spots of Japan. On the other hand, very impressive was the visit to Hiroshima. It touched me deeply, especially our visit to the museum dedicated to the memory of the desaster that hit the city with the deployment of the atomic bomb.

Me in Hiroshima.

After a few days we continued our journey by plane and headed a little over two hours south to Japan's „Hawaii“, to Okinawa. Here, a mild, spring like climate awaited us (after the winterly temperatures of Kyoto). We stayed in the islands capital Naha, which to me seemed like a smaller version of Honolulu, a little more modern, cleaner yet a little less beautiful. Unfortunately, to see Okinawas beautiful beaches, you better don't stay in the capital but rather head north on the island where many luxurious resort hotels can be found. We did get our fare share of natural beauty though on a self organized excursion to one of the closer outlying islands, to Tokashiki

Grotere kaart weergeven

Here, we found beautiful crystal clear waters on white sand beaches and water as blue as you'd always dream of a South Pacific sea would be like. We rented a bike and drove from one side of the island to the other and had a brilliant day on this remote, deserted spot. The weather was nice too and we managed to get a sunburn that day.

Dani in Naha, Okinawa.

After our few, relaxing days on Okinawa we again took the plane and headed north again and flew to Haneda, Tokyo's „city“ airport. In Tokyo, we again stayed at a Ryokan, the typical japanese style hotel. Of course as one can imagine the city is so large that it takes days to get at least a first impression of this fascinating metropolis.

Dani and me at night in Tokyo.

We walked through the most famous and interesting districts, at day and night, like Akihabara (where we looked for some electronic gadget bargains which in the end we didn't find). Of course we managed to visit the beautiful Ghibli Museum, a visit I can really recommend if you like the movies of Miyazaki!

Dani and me at the Ghibli museum.

We went to Shibuya and also Shinjuku, we went up on the Tokyo Tower, payed visits to Roppongi Hills to enjoy the spectacular views from the top of Japan's highest building at night, we walked through the center along the Emperor's Palace and of course payed a visit to the Tokyo Anime Fair which was very interesting to attend to! Of course we had a drink one night in a gay bar and Dani even introduced me to a gay sauna, my first visit ever – how exciting!

We visited the Tokyo Anime Fair.

Also from Tokyo we used the Shinkansens and went a little south to Hakone where we spent a wonderful day and enjoyed spectacular views of Japan's sacred mountain, the Fuji-san. We made a sightseeing cruise on Lake Ashi, rode the ropeway and took different trains and buses around the Hakone area. We concluded our day with a relaxing visit to a big and beautiful japanese Onsen. We were impressed by the beauty and the more begged for such an institution in our own countries. One can't describe the pleasance of having a relaxing bath while socializing with your friend, enjoying the soothing effect of the water and calmness on body and soul.

Another excursion took us north to Sendai and a little further to Matsushima, considered one of the three most scenic spots of Japan. We again were very lucky with the weather and enjoyed a beautiful sunny day at this gorgeous spot on the northern coast of Japan. We took an enjoyable little boat cruise around the bay of Matsushima and before returning to Tokyo paid a very brief visit to the city center of Sendai, a city that surprised us how big and clean it was. We somehow had expected a much smaller city up there in the north. Again we returned by the reliable Shinkansen in a two hour ride back to Tokyo.

During our visit to one of the three most scenic spots of Japan, at Matsushima.

Our trip to Japan ended much too soon unfortunately. We spent lovely days at all places. Dani and I got along very well. To me it felt as if I knew my lilbro for ages. I truly enjoyed his company day and night and now, being at home, I can honestly say I miss him very much – in a good, pleasant way of missing your buddy, your true friend, someone you really love and very much look forward to seeing him again real soon if possible. To me, this was a very special trip, certainly an unforgettable trip of a lifetime. It was an honour to spend it with you Dani, I feel privileged to have been your travel mate for this memorable journey. From the bottom of my heart, I deeply thank you for being that special friend that once again you proved to be. Thank you for taking me with you on this journey. I will cherish the precious memory in my heart.

All comes to an end, eventually: we are checked in for our return flight in Business class again to Munich. A kind ground staff of All Nippon Airways offered to take this shot of us at Narita airport, one day before the terrible crash of the FedEx plane that a day later would turn the airport in a chaos.

Thank you Dani, for all you did, for the great times, the wonderful holiday, for the little brother you are to me. A million kisses and just as much hugs to you, beloved lilbro. Still, that wouldn't be enough...

My first Kiss

2009-03-26T07:38:00.002+01:00

It was my first visit to Klaus. I had met him through a common friend in my hometown and it clicked on our first meeting. I was interested in him and he in me which surprised me. He is five years older. We agreed on a visit and I went to visit him by train. I hoped to stay overnight for the first time in my life but had no idea if that would work out. After I arrived it sooned turned out he had similar ideas about my visit... ;-) We came closer to each other on his couch in the living room and that's where we first kissed and which became my first passionate "real" kiss.
I remember the days after were a bit embarrassing as I had sore lips from heavy kissing with him...

A look at Air New Zealand's 747!

2009-02-23T00:01:00.003+01:00

Alright, so I'm an airline and aviation geek. But you all knew that already. I haven't talked about that too much here so far, haven't I? The other day I came across a video which I want to share with you. It's an interesting video from a CBS show ("Amazing race") where tv host Phil Keoghan will demonstrate the in's and out's of a Boeing 747-400 of Air New Zealand. It's a very interesting look especially inside the super comfortable business class where he explains how the seats work of the ingenious fishbone design business class (that also e.g. Virgin Atlantic uses). Who wouldn't want to travel like that?

A hug.

Now serving penis on Northwest...

2009-02-20T17:39:00.000+01:00

Okay, you might know that I love airlines and aviation but I couldn't believe my ears when I heard this sensational news: I mean I was already "Nuts about Southwest" airlines' slogan... but hey, they now started serving PENIS on Northwest flights! Gonna luv' em for that, don't ya think? But here for yourself and spread the good news...

With this fun news I wish you all a very good weekend :-)

Luv and hugs.

Messy Meat "Carl's Jr." Commercial

2009-02-19T00:02:00.000+01:00

Isn't that a one of a kind hamburger commercial...?

Messy Meat Banned This Carl’s Jr. Commercial

Posted using ShareThis

Oh, I forgot to mention that obviously the ordering company did not approve the commercial for release... :-) I still wonder what marketing genius came up with the idea for this one...

Miss Kiss Kiss Bang.

2009-02-17T00:01:00.000+01:00

Here is the german entry for Eurovision 2009: Oscar Loya ft Alex C - Miss Kiss Kiss Bang. Unfortunately, so far I could not trace a video so you have to do with this one.
The song is nice, a bit in the same style as two years ago but I doubt this song will take any high rankings. But decide for yourself:

A hug.

Happy Valentine's!

2009-02-14T00:01:00.003+01:00

Today, a week ago I had one of the most beautiful moments of my life: I was at the Mamma Mia musical in London, they sang my absolute favorite song of all time "Dancing Queen" and I was there with my Jelle and Dani and Sera and then my beloved lilbro Dani and I started singing out loud this wonderful song together! I was soooo happy and it's a very precious memory now, one I will cherish for all time.

Thank you Dani, Jelle and Sera for making this such a wonderful moment, I owe you my deepest thanks. A million kisses to you.

I love you guys. Happy Valentine's day.

Free speech?

2009-02-13T10:43:00.005+01:00

Yesterday, something happened in Europe that really upset me: Geert Wilders, a dutch politician and an elected member of the dutch parliament, has been refused entry into the United Kingdom on grounds of being a thread to public order!

What upsets me is the fact that a citizen of the EU is not free to go to another EU country and make use of your right of free speech! The UK had informed Wilders a day before via the Embassy that he would be refused entry. He chose to go anyway as he was being invited by members of the British parliament to show the controversial short movie Fitna (link to the english version) he has made. One has to know that Wilders is a right wing anti-islam campaigner who is very controversial in Holland too. I don't share his views at all but I still believe it must be possible in the so called "free" and united Europe to travel to another member state and make use of your right of free speech. If it starts here with such a "simple" refusal, where does it end some day...? Just to assume he might upset some or maybe even all parts of a society cannot be a reason to refuse him his right of free speech and ban him from entering the country! I hope he will appeal the UK's government's decision at court and fight for his right to enter the UK anyway as he was adviced to do by a dutch minister! Once again, I don't sympathize with his radical political views and I don't like his way of making politics in a very tabloid style manner but I believe he should be given the right to enter the UK and discuss his views with british politicians.

Here's an english language article of one of Holland's reputed newspapers, NRC Handelsblad.

Britain's BBC also reported on this.

A hug.

Discipline.

2009-02-12T01:09:00.002+01:00

Here's the thing: I need to be more disciplined. I tend to spend way too much time in front of this computer without doing something really useful. Since weeks for example I try to start a photobook project (like blurb) and until now I have not set up a single page... I have a few ideas in my mind but still, I don't start. Another thing is my "Learning Spanish" project, I have spoken about that recently. Though no course or such is on the agenda yet, I am busy with it now trying to consider different options on how to continue with that (but I still feel I could be more disciplined about it). I want to go to the cinema regularly but still have to set up a schedule for myself. I have to be more strict (again, disciplined) to myself with regard to cooking. We tend to be way too lazy and rely a lot on prefab food from Albert Heijn (the dutch supermarket chain). I have started to force myself to cook, even if only for myself ('cause Jelle is once again on a self imposed diet...sigh). I like the cooking, I liked the food I made and it doesn't cost too much time (which I was afraid of). I made a start, but I need to continue more strict with the cooking thing. Another thing: punctuality! I am not punctual at all, since months. I urgently need to change that. And then, there is the most hatred part I have to be more disciplined on: household. That includes anything, from cleaning dishes, doing laundry, dusting, tidying the rooms and keep them tidy. The problem with the last is that this also involves Jelle and since we both are very much alike it's not working very well if I am disciplined and he is not... So for that I still have to find a workable solution. But at least I need to start on myself to be more focused on such things. It's not something I can't do, it's just a question of discipline, I believe.

Please feel free to share your ideas on these things, I am again thankful for every tip and suggestion.

Very disciplined, a hug.

Unforgettable visit

2009-02-10T22:22:00.008+01:00

My very special birthday cake, candles blown out already after I made a wish

So on Friday was my birthday and as I had said before I would go to London to celebrate it!

To summarize it shortly: it was the best birthday I've had. After we all had arrived in London and checked in at our hotel I was in for a big surprise: Dani, Jelle and Sera had organized a birthday cake for me and they entered the room with it, singing "Happy Birthday" to me! Now that I think of it it does bring tears of happiness to my eyes... it was really so beautiful, at that moment I felt the luckiest person in the world! Thinking back of it, I am happy again! I was there, with my hubby and my most beloved friends celebrating my birthday for the first time in many years. Since a long time I did not bother to celebrate this day. I accepted that my parents would congratulate me but I never felt like celebrating it with somebody. But this year was different: some things in my life have changed and therefore I also wanted to celebrate my birthday again. I opted to make it special and asked Dani and Sera if they would come with me to London to see Mamma Mia together! When they said "YES!" that was the biggest and most beautiful gift for my birthday already! I was so happy that I had the chance of celebrating this (non special 42nd) birthday with them and my hubby Jelle.

The same night we had a very nice meal in an asian restaurant (and my chopstick capabilities are terrible... how am I gonna survive a vacation in Japan...?) and after returning to our hotel we took a piece of my birthday cake for dessert ;-)

Jelle, Dani, Sera and me

The next day, Sera's good friend Marisa joined us and we strolled leisurely through London, did some shopping, met my flickr friend Bernie finally for the first time which was really great fun! He is as nice in real life as he is on flickr and I am really happy I have had the chance to finally meet and see him "live".

Me and Bernie

Later on we also met Dani's friends Leo and Matt. And then, in the evening, we went to see the musical of Mamma Mia! I had seen the dutch version of the musical some years ago and did like that a lot. But I was very eager to see the original language version here in London and I must say it was really great!!! The performance was fantastic, the live orchestra and the cast performed so stunning well, it was pure pleasure to see them play and hear them sing!

Sera, Marisa, me, Jelle and in the front Dani (photo taken by Leo).

Dani and I were constantly singing along and in the end when they start playing the full song of Dancing Queen for everybody to sing along there was no stopping us anymore. It gave me shivers of joy and excitement to sing out loud and together with my beloved lilbro the song which is one of my all time favorites! That was soooo much fun, I was happy, really really happy!

Jelle, Dani and Marisa

On Sunday we visited Camden Market which I enjoyed a lot. It is so diverse, I saw lots of funny t-shirts (though I didn't buy any) and we had some fabulous food in one of the food stalls there. We then made our way down to the Thames to have a look at the London Eye and that concluded our activities in London for our short but oh so worthwhile visit! We had to go back to the airport where we both caught our planes back to Amsterdam and Madrid, sadly, both were delayed (thanks a lot, Easyjet).

Once again, this was a memorable, very special incredible weekend for me and I want to thank Jelle, Dani and Sera for making it so wonderful. It was awesome guys, thanks a lot to you. Many kisses to you and lots of hugs. I can't thank you enough for making me so happy and spoiling me so much. From now on, my birthdays will never be the same again...

Mamma Mia, it's my birthday!

2009-02-06T11:35:00.001+01:00

Yay! Today is my birthday and I have a very special weekend ahead: Jelle and I are going to London where we will meet with my beloved lilbro Dani and his hubby Sera to spend a wonderful weekend together. One of the highlights will be our visit to Mamma Mia! We all love ABBA and the musical. I have seen the dutch version of it and of course the fantastic movie but I always wanted to see the english version of the musical as well. This weekend it's going to happen! Yay, I am so happy to be able to spend this weekend together with my dearest friends. It'll be great and I hope to tell you after my return in a short post how it was.
Until then, have a great weekend y'all!

Many kisses and hugs.

Learning spanish?

2009-02-03T00:01:00.002+01:00

Okay, so here's the problem: I am lazy. But I want to learn Spanish. I had started to attend a course back in July last year until end of last year. But due to my work I had missed several lessons so I quit and did not continue 'cause I was unable to make up for the missed lessons.
I know that I need to learn, that I need to be less lazy in that. I am willing to. Though at the moment I think it makes no sense for me to attend a school again as I can foresee that I won't be able to regularly attend it due to several holidays I will take. I also work shifts which makes it very difficult to visit a course regularly. But still, I desperately want to learn this beautiful language. I haven't figured out a plan yet how to do it, any suggestions from your side? Self study needs a lot of discipline which I also don't have, so the school thing was a good slight pressure for me... ;-) Luckily I have a few friends with Spanish as their mother tongue and I can pick up the pronunciation from them from time to time. But maybe some of you have had similar experiences in picking up a language and can share their opinion. I know I need guidance in learning due to my lacking self discipline. Maybe I should look into some online communities...

Un abrazo, everybody. ;-)

Shine!

2009-02-01T23:17:00.053+01:00

May I introduce to you Holland's Eurovision songfestival entry for this year in Moscow: "Shine" performed by the Toppers! I saw sunday night's finals live on tv and this year the Netherlands opted for a different decision making progress than the previous years. The artists are long known (I think since end of last year already) and tonight the winning song was chosen which they will perform in Moscow. A jury of 5 professionals gave their votes for six different songs that the toppers presented in a live show on tv and besides the professional jury the audience at home had the possibility to vote too! One third of the votes was given by the professionals, the rest by the audience. For the professionals, the song "Shine" was number 2 while the audience put it on number one so with all votes combined "Shine" became the winning song.

The three men who will perform at Moscow are very popular artists in the Netherlands. The "Toppers" as they call themselves are together since a few years and easily fill the Amsterdam Arena or similar big arenas for several days for extremely popular sing-a-long concerts. Shortly after they had been announced to be the artists for the dutch entry for Eurovision last year, one of their original members (Gerard Joling) decided to quit and for him a new member joined the Toppers (Jeroen van der Boom). Originally consisting of two gay members, now only one is left: Gordon! He is also the one who was very eager to get to the contest for his home country. He and Gerard Joling became immensely popular on tv as two very queer, very gay, very funny singers/entertainers with their own reallife soap, the Toppers concerts and many other tv shows they present with more or less huge success. Rene Froger is the third member, a very popular singer. After Joling left the group they brought in newcomer Jeroen van der Boom.

I like the chosen song, it was Jelle's and mine favorite too. It's a nice, happy, singable song. It's for sure not the winning entry, it's not eastern european enough I think... ;-) But still, I typical, yet nice eurovision song with a twist... though a little something is missing but in general it's a nice and worthy song for the contest. 'Nough talking, now listen to it:

Grand Prix hugs (in Germany the Eurovision Songfestival is known as the "Grand Prix")!

A respected boss.

2009-01-30T00:01:00.002+01:00

On the 29th of January, there was an interesting interview (unfortunately in german only) in the german newspaper Frankfurter Allgemeine Zeitung (FAZ) with Lufthansa's former boss Jürgen Weber. He is now the chairman of the board of the airline and as such gave an interview. The most interesting he commented on for me was his statement about salaries of top management: he thinks even top managers should not earn more than 100 times the average of the companies' employees salaries. I think that's reasonable. He says we can't take America as an example anymore and I agree on that, they simply went crazy there with the giant salaries for even failing managers. He is a simple modest man who worked his way up in the company and that's what I admire about him. He is realistic, he knows the problems of the small employee in the company as well as he sees the whole picture of the airline in the competitive business. He has a lot of respect between the employees I think. He was very popular when he was still the boss of the airline. He is the kind of boss I have respect for. Too bad today's modern, younger managers don't have his style anymore.

Youth memories

2009-01-29T01:14:00.005+01:00

Sometimes it pays when you go from one blog to the next and further to another one: that's what I did tonight when I followed a link to the blog La pastilla roja. I was attracted by a too familiar logo that appeared as a still in a youtube video, as seen below: Falcon Crest! It was my most favorite of those typical american soaps of that time and I really loved it. And I guess that was partly because of the beard of one of the main actors... god, I'm so predictable... :-P In any case, I loved the series and also the main tune and you can listen back to it down here. If you want to know more about the series, follow the link to the blog as the author has an interesting post with more details about the series.

I wonder if many of you liked this series too or which of the famous ones was your favorite? Was it Dallas, Denver (as Dynasty was titled in Germany) or Falcon Crest? I don't know Santa Barbara, I can't remember that we had it back then in Germany.

A warm cuddly hug for you.

Thank you.

2009-01-25T11:58:00.005+01:00

First of all let me apologize to you that it has been quite a while now since my last post. But for me the christmas period was kind of busy and I also did not always feel like posting something. You all probably know the feeling that there is something to say but you don't know really how and in that case I rather prefer not to say anything than something stupid. I asked my lilbro for some tips on how he always manages to write something, with the precision of a swiss clock. So I will try to use those tips in the future.

However, I would like to thank my beloved lilbro for something beautiful he did to me. I feel very honoured and at the same time even a bit ashamed as I feel I did not deserve it: he awarded me the "I love your blog" prize! Thank you so much Dani, it means a lot to me. But let me assure you that I don't think I deserve it but I appreciate what you express with it to me. That truly made me happy, so thank you once again. I felt very insecure and - as I said - a bit ashamed and actually did not really know how to react, whether to ignore it post wise or comment on it. In the end, as you now can read here, I decided to express my appreciation publically. I usually don't like these chain-things and I still don't really know how to react and what to do with it, what the appropriate way to react would be. So, all I can say is thank you very much I guess. I know and understand why you gave this prize to me, Dani, and that truly makes me happy and very proud and thankful.

A very tender kiss, my lilbro, for being the way you are and doing what you do to me.

Congratulations to all other awarded winners who truly deserved their prizes, I am happy for you. Hugs to you all.

P.S.: I hope to soon post more often again. In the meantime, why don't you check my flickr pages where I post regularly about me and my life in pictures?

Miracle

2008-12-10T00:01:00.001+01:00

Today, I would like you to listen to the title song of a dutch movie. It's in dutch cinemas at the moment though I haven't seen it as the plot did not look very appealing to me.

In contrast to that is the title song which I like very much and which I purchased on iTunes. It's called "Miracle" and is sung by no less than famous dutch singer Ilse DeLange and can be found on her album "Incredible". I did not find a video of the song though there is a youtube version where you at least can listen to the song (which is what I want you to, after all). ;-)

Someone put a lock on this old door

It's been beaten up and used and more

It's been kicked a hundred thousand times

Keeping all the memories behind

If you read the lines between the paint

Look beyond the cracks that store away

It's hidden in the windows of the walls

Right behind the eyes that saw it all

Given all the facts of circumstance

I did not believe that a romance

Would show itself in all this dark and blue

That's the only place I ever knew

You put me outside my safety-zone

Outside all the lines that made my home

To find out that no one really lives

Without giving what it is you give

A miracle looking in my life

A mirror-ball showing me all these faces

A miracle looking in my life, after all

A miracle looking in my life

A mirror-ball showing me all these faces

A miracle

I've been living underneath my skin

Everything I felt I kept it in

It carried all the words without a sound

It got me, it almost got too loud

But now that my arms are holding on

To someone as sacred as a song

To the one who wants to be my own

I have found that blood can come from stone

A miracle looking in my life

A mirror-ball showing me all these faces

A miracle looking in my life, after all

A miracle looking in my life

A mirror-ball showing me all these faces

A miracle

A miracle looking in my life

A mirror-ball showing me all these faces

A miracle looking in my life, after all

A miracle looking in my life

A mirror-ball showing me all these faces

A miracle looking in my life, after all

A miracle looking in my life

A mirror-ball showing me all these faces

A miracle

Someone put a lock on this old door

It's been beaten up and used and more

It's been kicked a hundred thousand times

It's keeping all the memories behind

I hope you like it as much as I do, I think it's really beautiful. As mentioned before elsewhere here, I'm a big fan of soundtracks, I just love these kind of songs and music. Yeah, I agree, it's a typical song for me to like, kind of romantic... after all, I'm hopelessly romantic and always a dreamer... a tender hug and kiss for you.

Ciao - a movie.

2008-12-07T10:46:00.001+01:00

Today I came across a trailer of a gay movie that fascinated me the moment I read the story. I can't wait to see it. Here's the synopsis from the official site of the movie:

A man dies very unexpectedly and leaves behind two men: Jeff, his best friend, and Andrea, an Italian he’s been corresponding with online. Jeff informs Andrea of Mark’s passing; Andrea writes back to express his shock and sympathies. On a whim, they continue their correspondence and a rapport grows between them. They eventually meet, where they extend their e-mail exchanges into more personal and intimate conversations. They talk about their respective countries, their jobs, their families, their lives. Mostly, they talk about Mark. What began as a tragedy that linked two strangers from different ends of the world becomes a deeply realized friendship that may change their lives forever.

There is a group on facebook about the movie: CIAO movie | Facebook

and an official movie site: http://www.ciaomovie.com

Have a brilliant weekend everyone, hugs.

Lounge visit

2008-12-05T00:01:00.006+01:00

As usual, the story I have to tell today is probably not very interesting for most of you - because it's airline related and I'm the only geek around here about that... ;-) Still, I feel like sharing it with somebody. So maybe I should start it with "Dear diary..." hahaha, just kidding.

What I want to share is about something work related (somehow) I experienced a few days ago. I had the chance to visit the VIP lounge of the airport of Amsterdam. I was lucky enough that the lounge was completely unoccupied and I got a personal tour. Unfortunately I cannot show you any own photos but I have included some photos from the promotional folder so you have a better idea of what I am talking about.

I had to go all the way to the newest part of the terminal in Amsterdam airport, find my way through a giant crowd of Hajj passengers that were checking in and being accompanied by an even bigger group of families and friends and in the very last corner is a side entrance of which the sign says it leads to the press centre. When I am about to ring the door bell it miraculously opens and of course I'm impressed already... ;-) I entered, climbed up some stairs and entered a different world, so much quieter and calm than the hustle and bustle of the "ordinary" terminal. One floor higher, in a completely different surrounding than the "ordinary" terminal downstairs you find the lounge of the famous and important people where they rest and wait before their flight takes off. The facility is provided by the airport and is only available to the so called "very important" people from governments/embassies and such, though it's not meant for the rich and famous so you would most probably not bump into famous pop or movie stars ;-) Though from what I heard that might change in the future and become a little more commercial.

The whole occupied space seemed very large to me; though to my surprise it felt less luxurious than I had expected it. If you have ever walked into lobbies of luxury hotels then you somehow get the look and feel of the lounge.
The overall design is very modern, with dutch accents but trying to avoid typical dutch icons like tulips and cheese... ;-) Even more surprising to me was the Royal Lounge, the lounge that is used by the dutch Royal Family during their stay at the airport.

I felt it is very modest, in a very modern design in white, blue and orange tones. A little cabinet holds the toys for the children, a few "family" photos try to give it a little more "personal" touch. The couches you see on the photo are standard and can be bought in stores I have been told but have been modified for better, slightly more comfortable seating (as they are very [too?] low). But there were no immense luxuries that you might expect in the Royal lounge. Other space of the VIP lounge is used for a bar or other lounge rooms,

all in modern designs with more or less subdued colors or here and there a colorful accent like you see here in the bar. There is even a shower room which is a pleasant walk-in shower room, yet not overly luxurious, again something you will find in First Class lounges of airlines. Finally, the lounge even offers a pleasant waiting room for the drivers of the limousines of the VIPS where they can wait in a pleasant and comfortable (yet a little hidden and windowless) space for their next duties, including free coffees and soups... ;-) Last but not least, a sober not to big room is used for press conferences at the airport. I liked its design, a light, white walled room with black chairs (only one in a special "cow" design) on a carpet that was made from a photo that shows an airview of the landscape on approach to the airport while the ceiling shows the blue sky above the airport.

All in all, I think one can compare this lounge a little bit with the First Class Terminal that my employer offers at its hub in Frankfurt. Though I have never seen it personally I think one can compare the features and design and concept of the terminal with that of the smaller VIP lounge in Amsterdam.

The funny thing was to learn that many features designed by the architect do look great from a designer's point of view but are terrible to work with from an employee's point of view :-D

We have the same problem at our ticket counter which looks great but has some serious design issues - but that of course is another post yet to be written. ;-)

I am very thankful to have been able to see the lounge, as it's truly something very special only few people will ever see. Hopefully I could give you a little impression on my imaginary walk around this lounge.

A very important hug.

Sorry, my friend.

2008-12-03T23:49:00.005+01:00

Nooo, I haven't done any bad things to him. I didn't hurt him. But what I do though is being like a limpet, at least sometimes. I am aware of that. I use him as my little straw to hold on to while being in a maelstrom of emotions. I feel very attached to him, I trust him and I know he understands me a lot. But I always forget one thing, that he has his own life with lots of friends, a boyfriend, family, his hobbies and his own problems as well and that he cannot always be there for me even though he wants to.

But I know I don't leave him space to breath, I come too close too often. That is one of my bad characteristics, to try to claim people. So I guess I will have to learn to keep some distance. I don't always have to speak to him when I see him online or contact him in other ways. Let's see if I will manage. I know I'm not good in these things.

I am sorry, my friend, I apologize.

Life of a moth.

2008-12-01T01:32:00.004+01:00

What can I say? Not much I guess. When being asked what I did this weekend I answered "the usual", meaning I worked and did nothing.

I feel not bad, there's just that emptiness inside. There are some things that I really look forward to in the coming months. So, there are little highlights on the horizon. But on the short term? Even then: I look forward to Christmas, not the holiday but something that is more important to me than that but hopefully will take place around that time.

I'm the kinda guy that people like, it's nice to have me over for a coffee, or maybe have a dinner with but not the kind you would call. You just don't think of someone like me, I guess. Hey, it's nice if I call and ask you out, ask for a date to meet, yeah. But most would never think of calling me. Maybe I'm not entertaining enough, not funny enough, not intelligent enough to have a good talk. I don't know, it's a guess, a very wild one. I developped that theory from facebook. I noticed. I look at some people and they constantly are busy, get comments and have nice, sometimes even funny "chats" with their friends. I never belong there, for a multitude of reasons. I understand those reasons. Unfortunately for me, I seem unable to build this myself. I just can't and I don't know why?

I compare myself with a moth, circling around the light. The light is another friend. Lots of moths circle around that light. I'm just a moth, not the light where other moths circle around me. ;-) A funny picture maybe, but kind of true. On facebook I keep on commenting on other people's comments, status or whatever and if I'm "lucky" I do get a reply. It doesn't happen very often though that someone reacts on something I do. I regularly get those invitations for some kind of app, yeah sure. But frankly, many of the few friends I have do have much more friends and therefore get much more attention by more different people (I guess). I wonder if that's deep and satisfying but at least it's some kind of attention... I still refuse to believe in those mass friendships, I still try to build "real" friendships, if that's possible at all? Same on flickr, if I don't comment regularly on others' streams or post very "provocative" photos, very few really care it seems. Though I feel it costs me way too much energy for little or nothing in return. I have no clue if I do something wrong or what I should do different - maybe there isn't anything I can do more or different, maybe that's just the way it is? Maybe I have to accept that people just like to have me in the background, not too overly present, as a kind of human decoration in their lives?

I find it hard to "just" be the moth, I envy the "lights", the guys who have that natural popularity. I should be used to it by now, it was never different in my life. So, I should not complain, go back to my chat and wait another minute or three before it's this moth's turn again for an answer... Don't get me wrong, I do understand, I always have, always will, that's how I am.

That's - I guess - the life of a moth.

P.S.: my comments are made in general and don't have any reference to a particular person; it's meant as a general observation of how I feel and I really do not refer to anybody in particular.

To the unknown reader.

2008-11-21T00:02:00.001+01:00

Hello dear reader.

Yes, today I am talking to you. I don't know who you are but obviously you know me and for some reason are interested in some way in me and my life. That's amazing, as it is not very special or exciting. But nevertheless, you come here regularly and I don't know who exactly you are. It's a pity because if you read my blog carefully you would know I like to meet new people, so why don't you say "hi" to me? The other day Jelle said to me he heard from someone at work (and I didn't bother to ask, I don't know why) that I had written something on my blog about my parents. That of course started me thinking who in the world you could be. Obviously you speak more to my boyfriend at work than to me and still my life seems interesting enough for you to follow it here on my blog. I think it's a bit sad that you do not approach me directly, if you are interested in me. Or am I not interesting enough for that? But then again, why bother following my blog? Oh well, I may never find out who you are and I can live with it. After all, it's a public blog and I have to take such things into account. But still I would be happy if you leave a mark here, ask me if you have a question. If I can, I'll answer it.

Besides all that, thank you for your interest and enjoy your stay here. ;-)

Project Grandpa, continued.

2008-11-20T00:02:00.000+01:00

Alright, so you may have seen these photos before ;-) But that's simply because they are not mine but I have 'borrowed' them from my lilbro's flickr stream. I especially like the second one, by the way.

So, what's this post about? Simply put, the makeover of yours truly. :-P Yes, I am still busy to get a little more modern look and I gladly use the help of my beloved lilbro. So during the weekend break of my training at Zurich I went down to Madrid to visit Dani and Sera. We again had a great weekend and as you may have read in his post as well we did some shopping. Unfortunately, time was very limited but Dani nevertheless tried to squeeze in as many shopping opportunities as possible in such short time. And as you can see, we were successful! Don't you like my more modern look now? I do in any case, I really feel much better (in german they say "Kleider machen Leute") and it was much fun to do the shopping with him. I look forward to continue that as this seems to be a long term project... Also Jelle likes the new look of his boyfriend. ;-) Dani had sent him the pictures before I returned home and Jelle could have a look personally last weekend when I first wore the "new look"- items for our visit to the cinema. It's amazing, a "little" change (it seems) to your clothing and you feel better, more self assured maybe. At least it felt comfortable. So, during the next weeks I will have to add more items to my wardrobe and I can't wait to go shopping with Dani again, a whole afternoon (don't you dare to plan anything else in between... hahahaha).

I really regretted that Dani wasn't in Zurich the last evening I walked through the lovely shopping streets together with my colleague Gaby because we came across a great shoe shop, they had lots and lots of great and cool sneakers and I really wondered which one Dani would have chosen for me... ;-) You all may think it seems crazy that I do not choose my own clothing. But I like to rely on Dani's advice as in my eyes he has a good taste and knows what suits his bigbro. Those who know me personally have seen the result when I choose my own and as a result I rely on lilbro's advice now... hahahaha. Honestly, if you let me choose my own stuff, I go for the "safe" but boring style. I guess I simply don't have that gay fashion gene... :-)

Besides our shopping it was a great though short weekend. We went to two family birthdays which I both enjoyed, we met our wonderful friend Alex for a drink in Callao and we had a nice dinner on friday and a just as nice lunch on sunday!

I definitely always eat too much when I'm with Dani and Sera, you guys simply know to enjoy life ;-) Besides of the good food, Dani also spoiled me with a movie of 'Sex and the City' and the first season of 'LOST', YES!!! I was speechless, he always surprises me with such things though it's not necessary at all. The greatest gift to me simply is his friendship. Thank you so much lilbro for everything, I truly enjoy all your gifts but remember they are not necessary ;-)

Before we headed to the airport on sunday because I had to return to Zurich to attend the second half of my training there, we visited Jose and Miguel who were receiving their first visit of family at their new house. It was my first look at their lovely new house too and I really enjoyed the visit too (even though we were not really able to communicate as my spanish is very very very very modest, to say the least...). :-)

Anyway, at the airport Dani dropped me off and we parted after another great weekend. Thanks again, lilbro for the fabulous time I had once again, kisses to you and Sera. Looking forward to see ya again soon! :-)

P.S.: If any of you has suggestions for my "Project Grandpa", feel free to drop me a line ;-)

A grandpa-ish hug to ya'll (no worries, it's definitely not contagious...sigh) ;-)

Training at Zurich.

2008-11-19T00:02:00.005+01:00

I have been quiet for the last weeks. But that had a reason: I was away for two weeks. My company had sent me to Zurich in Switzerland to undergo a training. Why? Because since the 15th of November we are handling the ticketing for Swiss Air Lines and they work with a completely different computer system than the one we have at our airline. So all our ticketing staff have to be trained for that. So, together with my colleague Gaby I went to Zurich. I had a great time I must say! It was really a lot of fun with Gaby and we enjoyed the training and having the possibility to learn something new! We were really lucky with our hotel which was brand new and after a fabulous breakfast every morning (with real good fresh bread, soooo good!) we felt prepared for a long day of training ;-) Swiss had a great training facility and the course was really interesting (though I must say that we felt like going back in time, their system feels so outdated and complicated and way too lengthy). What I always like about these trainings is the international atmosphere. This time, we met colleagues from Yaoundé, London, Florence, Montreal, Copenhagen, Zurich (but native japanese), Auckland, Nairobi and New York! I really enjoy this every time I attend a training. Beginning of next year our own facility will reopen (after some years of rebuilding) in Seeheim in Germany (close to Frankfurt, our main hub) and everybody is already looking forward to the new trainings there! ;-) We ended our training with a test, luckily though we were allowed to use all our materials so it was not that difficult. But still I managed to make a slight mistake in something (that's at least one thing I know for sure already) and I am really mad at me since I had all the time in the world to check it or avoid it but unfortunately I didn't realize it... oh well, I hope I still passed... :-D

Besides the trainings

we did not have much time to do anything in Zurich. In the first week Jelle visited us and together with him and Gaby we had a great dinner in the city center. During the weekend break (in

which

we could fly home) I opted for a short visit to Madrid to my lilbro Dani but I will tell you later in a dedicated post about it. At

the end of the second week Gaby and I decided to "celebrate" the end of our training with a nice dinner in town (all other nights we ate in or close to the hotel in the airport's food court or at the staff

cantine). It was a great evening out and a good end to our two weeks. It truly was a pleasure to have had the possibility to attend the training together with Gaby, a first for me to go on a training together with a colleague. It was so much more fun and you also had the possibility to exchange your thoughts and worries about the system and problems. I would not call it a vacation as some colleagues but still it was a great experience and I enjoyed it. ;-)

Thanks Gaby for the great time together, I enjoyed your company a lot!

Size does matter!

2008-11-18T04:15:00.001+01:00

I came across this amazing advertisment the other day: famous Dr. Ruth Westheimer is admitting "I collect"... First of all, I do too. ;-) Second, my collection is that of m...odels (of airplanes I flew with) and I think Ruth is right: after all, size does matter! :-P

What a funny advertisement, I just love it. LOL :-)

(seen in: Airways magazine, p.81, issue Nov.08)

A huge hug.

Quantum of Solace

2008-11-16T16:47:00.003+01:00

Saturday night, Jelle and I went to see the new James Bond movie "Quantum of Solace". I didn't like it too much. I mean, it was entertaining, I didn't get bored but I didn't like it as much as the "first" new Bond with Daniel Craig. His acting was good, I still like him as new Bond actor. But the movie itself was less attractive.

There was some resemblance with the "classic" bond movies, like beautiful people in beautiful and famous places (e.g. Siena), a few trials to make a joke, a hint to Bond's drink (but neither shaken nor stirred), no real bad jerks like a Goldfinger or such..., no fabulous gadgets... it more felt like a "standard" action movie, all the ingredients that used to make out a Bond movie were missing in my eyes. Though the previous Bond to this one did also away with many of these items it still felt like a Bond movie - this one didn't. I didn't like the many but average action scenes combined with fast scene cuts, shaky camera shots that obviously were ment to give it more rhythm. A few things exploded but I actually don't know why other than for the effect of it... The movie started with a lengthy action scene and at the end of it presented a "bad" guy. This bad guy later appeared again during the movie (why? I didn't understand how and why he escaped alive from the begin scene) but wasn't at all the one that the movie was all about - so a lot of fuzz for nothing... It was an entertaining movie but definitely not a good Bond movie in my eyes.

Interestingly, though the movie started in Holland already on th 6th of November the cinema yesterday was full (well, okay it was saturday...but still). We had purchased tickets online and came to the cinema late and were confronted with long lines in front of the box office, the ticket machines and the bar... sigh... since we "only" needed to pickup our tickets (I still don't understand why I have to exchange my confirmation with barcode into a ticket... why can't they simply scan the code at the entrance?) Jelle queued at the machines and I at the bar to purchase our cola and fanta and M&M's and chips (I hate popcorn). The machines didn't work so Jelle later joined me in my queue and after about almost twenty minutes wait we finally received our tickets at the bar and our refreshments. During the wait I had noticed that our movie in the meantime had sold out! But not only our show, there was also another cinema showing the movie, at the same time, next to us, which was also sold out and the later shows were also sold out. That movieplex alone had about 25 showings of the movie on saturday, amazing! So when we entered the cinema, of course it was full and we didn't find seats next to each other anymore (why the hell with all these electronics and stuff can't they assign seats for popular movies? Ridiculous!). So we had to sit behind each other and Jelle wasn't too amused about that and almost wanted to go home... oh well, we stayed and watched. ;-) Jelle said he never experienced a sold out movie theater before. I am sure I have but can't remember which movies it was...

Anyway, it was an interesting experience and for sure we will never go on a saturday night to an obviously popular movie... :-)

A hug.

Not much to say.

2008-10-27T23:38:00.003+01:00

Lately, I don't have much to talk about. Obviously a sign it's going pretty damn well with me. ;-) There are a few things on my mind to write about but at the moment I don't find the time to write about it. There are things that deserve a well written post and not just a few dropped lines like this one. I can only do that at home and I not always have the peace do concentrate on the things I want to say... anyway, this week is keeping me busy to prepare my stuff as I leave on sunday for two weeks to go to a training for my job to Zurich. For the first time I'm not going alone but together with a colleague. So I kinda look forward to it though I am still a bit hesitant to go as I feel I might feel lonely and isolated, missing to be able to (daily) talk to my loved ones. Therefore, I even look more forward to the weekend break of the training on which I will leave Zurich and head more southwards to... oh I will tell you later about it... ;-)

Last weekend, Jelle and I went to the city of Arnhem where we strolled through the centre, had some delicious fish (see the photo) and later cake and simply enjoyed a relaxed saturday afternoon. We came there after we attended a nearby cruise fair where we collected a lot of the latest cruise brochures to update ourselves for our holiday plans next year: yeah, Jelle and I are thinking of taking a little cruise again... ;-) Basically, that's all I have to tell about the things I did lately and the things that are planned in the nearby future. Nothing special, as you can tell.

Many hugs.

Proud about Dani: The Noken Master!

2008-10-22T07:32:00.000+02:00

Today, I want to draw your attention to my lilbro Dani's latest achievement, a self written program! True, it may come with his job that he is able to write a program, but still, I admire his talent to do it! He wrote a program for the sole purpose of making it more easy and fun for himself to learn Japanese. Head over to Dani's post and read all about his program, how it works, what it does and why he wrote it! It's amazing, I am stunned!

I am really so proud of you Dani, my lilbro, you are simply fantastic! For sure the way to go!

A hug.

Vamos a la playa!

2008-10-17T15:58:00.002+02:00

My idea of a nice day at the beach, yay! :-)

A cuddly hug.

P.S.: yes, I'm definitely an airline geek :-D

Masks, screens, faces and mirrors

2008-10-14T19:06:00.004+02:00

May I direct your attention to a very interesting post over at the blog of Finnegan Bell? I found it very much worth reading. Have a look here.

P.S.: Coincidentally, Finnegan chose a picture to accompany his post that reminded me of my own picture I took of such (the same?) mask this year in Scheveningen, The Hague.

...and the honour really goes to...

2008-10-14T12:29:00.005+02:00

Okay, now don't laugh about what I am going to tell, since it's completely insignificant but when it comes to flying and airlines in general and to my logbook in particular I can be as geek as certain people about their movies and mangas or other stuff... I have to make a little correction: in my post about my trip to Dani for his birthday I mentioned that Korean Air has had the "honour" of taking me on my 700th flight. But I made a mistake in accounting my flights and discovered I had forgotten two flights from the beginning of this year which I now added to my logbook so unfortunately Korean Air has to give up this honorable mention. I therefore announce the operator of my 700th flight as being LAN Chile on my flight from Madrid to Frankfurt, together with Jelle. So my number of flights now totals in 705. See, I told you not to laugh... but for a geek these things are important... ;-) My flight logbook is updated accordingly, you can find it here.

A hug.

Sick at home.

2008-10-13T14:24:00.002+02:00

Luckily it doesn't happen too often to me, but on sunday it did: I became sick. I had been at work for an early shift and I hadn't slept well. Actually I felt terrible that morning but still I decided to go to work. But arriving there I felt miserable: I sat behind in our "back office", just to come by. But suddenly, my blood pressure went wild and since I know that feeling I did what I know helps me in that case: I lay on the ground. But it was pretty cold and it is not comfortable, naturally. The chair in the back wasn't comfortable either and suddenly I had the urge to vomit! I did not make it to a toilet in time 'cause it came really quick and I had to use the waste basket in the office! I felt soooo bad and so stupid and kind of embarrassed. My colleague was sitting in the front and I was throwing up in the back... It helped a little but still I did not feel comfortable so my colleague sent me home. I had hoped to get home without any more throwing up but suddenly in the train it happened again so I hurried through the train and at the last minute I found the toilet... Luckily, I could get out fast enough as I was just finished when the train already was stopping at my station... At home, I went to bed immediately and still, I woke up several times and had to go to the toilet to throw up two more times... I stayed in bed until four in the afternoon because I felt really bad, tired and weak. My skin was very sensitive and it felt like I had a cold, every move felt unpleasant. I think I probably caught some kind of virus or I ate something bad the evening before. Jelle was very sweet and looked after me, gave me tea and salty pretzel sticks, dry bread and more tea.
Today, I am still drinking tea and soup only. My lilbro advised me to try some rice too so I added that to my soup (as you can see in the photo), that's more tasty and has some bite to it. I don't like the dry bread too much I must admit...
Luckily, today I feel better already. Jelle was very sweet and concerned and my lilbro is just as caring and it feels very pleasant to be pampered... I have reported sick for today as well and it feels good to be able to recover a few days as I am off duty for two more days as of tomorrow. The rest, sleeping and to not feel the draught (which we have a lot at the counter) feels good. It's really untypical for me to report sick but this time I felt I had to do it. The last time is years ago and I normally only do it if I really, really feel bad. So you can tell how bad I felt yesterday.

Anyway, I'm on the upwards path again but I felt I give in impression on what's going on - after all, that can be part of a blog as well. So I hope to be well and alright tomorrow or wednesday again.

Many hugs.

Thank you for the music, Sera!

2008-10-11T23:57:00.000+02:00

The other day when Dani, Sera and I were at Sera's house before we would go over to Dani's place and while Sera was getting ready, Dani and I listened to some music on Sera's iPod. Suddenly Dani played a piece of music that I knew for so long and didn't know what it was. So immediately I got excited because I wanted to know what it is but when Dani told me what Sera's iPod claimed it was I knew it wasn't the right title. But god bless modern technology: I asked Dani to use his iPhone's smart app Shazam (which Jelle recommended to him, just for the record... :-D ) to listen to the music (and occasionally lilbros do obey their bigbros wishes) and within a few seconds it returned the answer and I finally was able to download this wonderful piece of music! I think I know it from my childhood as the opening tune to some famous Radio Luxemburg show (back then, RTL was a very popular radio station in the Cologne/Rhineland area but broadcasting on FM from Luxemburg, it even had cult status especially amongst the younger audience - at that time, Germany did not know any private radio or tv but only public stations so RTL was a popular alternative to the dominant public Cologne based WDR).

So thank you so much Sera for bringing back this wonderful tune and with it some great childhood memories. May I present it to you? Here it is:

Barry White's Love Unlimited Orchestra - Love's theme

If you want to know more about the song, there's even some wikipedia info on it! So much for the seventies, welcome back to 2008!

Kisses to Sera and Dani, hugs to you all. ;-)

Think before you speak!

2008-10-10T11:41:00.001+02:00

Herzlichen Glückwunsch zum Geburtstag, Mama!

2008-10-09T18:04:00.000+02:00

Herzlichen Glückwunsch zum Geburtstag, Mama!

Today, my beloved mom celebrates her birthday and so I went to Cologne for the occasion to give her my birthday kisses personally. ;-) She was very happy and also my dad was very happy to see me. Mama prepared some simple but oh so tasty lunch and in the morning after my arrival I enjoyed a delicious breakfast with some typical german things I like for breakfast.

Then, way too early I already had to leave again to go back to Amsterdam. I was only one day off which I had specially requested due to her birthday so I could only go there in the morning and come back the same day. But it felt good to see them again. They were very sweet to me, I enjoyed seeing them, talking to them and it made me really happy to see that my mom was so happy with my visit!

In the afternoon, Mama and Papa drove me back to the airport and before I had to go through the security control we had a last espresso and that's where I took these pictures.

I hope there will be a chance soon for them to come over to Amsterdam or else for another visit of me to Cologne.

Updated, pictures included! Going to Madrid: 28 Cumpleaños Dani

2008-10-07T13:02:00.004+02:00

Korean Air Airbus 330
Originally uploaded by CruisAir

Today, I want to give a short trip report about my trip to Dani's birthday.

On Friday, after a very short night because I simply stayed up too long (say, til' around 1.00am...) and after my early shift that started at 05.00 in the morning I was able to catch a plane to Madrid.
As you know, I like airlines and planes and if possible I try to fly as much as possible on different airlines and aircraft and different routes... (and you thought YOU were strange, huh?...).

Anyway, coincidentally, this trip was special: first, it was my 700th flight ever! The honour for taking me safely to my destination goes to Korean Air. I took their flight KE925 which started in Seoul and made a stop in Amsterdam on its way to Madrid. It was a nice and pleasant flight. I was a bit disappointed though that I did not have personal inflight entertainment which I had expected on a long haul aircraft. The catering though was pretty good, a warm (!) meal was served for the two hour flight which was a bit delayed (because the aircraft already left Seoul too late). All in all, I would rate the flight (despite the warm meal) behind the recent LAN Chile flight from Madrid to Frankfurt.

The second reason why this trip was special was THE reason to go anyway: my beloved little brother would turn 28 on that weekend and it meant a lot to me to be there with him and to celebrate. As I said before, Dani is very important in my life for a trillion of reasons. Therefore it was a true highlight to be there and personally congratulate him.

When I arrived on Friday, I "amused" Dani a lot: I guess he thought I was retarded because I couldn't find where he was waiting for me but I swear, the signage at Madrid's T1 is terrible and will lead you anywhere but your destination! My god, it took many calls to him to get directions before blond me finally found him patiently waiting outside... did I mention that I even sent him to T4 in the first place, assuming my plane would arrive there...? And did I mention I told him I would arrive after only a one hour flight...? My god, it must have been my sleep shortage that day... and I even work for an airline but all I did and said that day was simply, ehm....retarded :-D

Dani, Sera and I went to a gigantic mall on Friday evening. They invited me for dinner (I'm never allowed to pay, I seriously have to talk with you guys about that!) at a very good asian buffet restaurant where we had a great dinner with lots and lots of food!

Saturday, Dani and I did some shopping for the evening when some friends would come to join the celebration. Dani prepared a quiche in the afternoon (another of his "famous" recipes) which was really good! We made sandwiches and cheese/ham/tomato sticks and had the usual party ingredients like chips, nuts and that kinda stuff.

In the evening, his guests arrived and it was truly a really nice night! We laughed and talked a lot and I was simply very happy to be there when it turned 12:00 and my lilbro turned 28!

Dani got some really nice presents and I think he loved them all. It made me soooo happy to see him happy too!

Me and Dani wearing one of his presents he received

After opening all his presents and even more laughs and talks we went to a totally packed Irish pub close by for a final beer and we all went home after that. It really was a great birthday celebration, I loved it!

On sunday, after we slept long we had lunch with his friends

Jose and Miguel

and his mom at a very good chinese restaurant! After that, Dani and Sera met some friends to go to a theater show while I met with Alex to have a drink which was very nice. After it, we met again and went home to conclude another wonderful evening at Dani's cosy home!

I had a great time, it was awesome, sensational, brilliant and simply fun to join Dani for the first time on his birthday and I guess I can call myself a really happy man to have a friend like him! Thank you, my beloved little brother, for the wonderful time again and being the friend to me that you are! I am so lucky, so happy, so blessed.

Feliz cumpleaños, Dani!

2008-10-05T00:01:00.002+02:00

Today, my beloved Dani, the man who during time became my best friend and who I dearly love, for being the "little brother" I never had but always wanted, for being the true friend one always desires to have, turns 28:

Feliz cumpleaños, querido Dani

With all my heart dear lilbro I and also Jelle wish you all the best for your birthday and the new year in your life. I hope it will bring lots of beautiful things to happen in your life. May your love to Sera blossom as never before, may you always be healthy, may all the dreams and hopes you have come true - if I can be of help of any kind you can count on me, always. The greatest gift I can give to you is already with you since long. It's getting bigger, more precious and unique with every day. What more can I add, except for my extra special and sweet birthday kisses and the most tender hugs your bigbro can give you.

How...very saucy...

2008-10-02T00:30:00.000+02:00

At the moment, Jelle and I are catching up with watching "Desperate Housewives". I've missed too many episodes when they first aired so now that they are on our cable on demand services we watch them from the very beginning to the end. The other day we really had a very very good laugh about Bree (what gay man wouldn't love her?) in one of the early episodes of season 3. Bree is looking for her son Andrew (who she had dumped) and meets Pearly... here is the video that includes the scene in the very beginning:

"Pearly Gates, you can't get to heaven without going through me..." and Bree responds: "...How...very saucy..."

Muuuaaaahhhh.... ROFL... this is soooo funny, we really got a kick out of it... soooo sooo funny, really! I hope you liked that, at the moment we are both really addicted to "Desperate Housewives", I also started watching Grey's anatomy (again, well just like "DH" from the beginning) but I put that on hold due to lack of time. On the "waiting list" is "Prison Break" now and "Heroes" and "Brothers & Sisters"... I think I know someone from whom I can borrow the DVDs for the first two waitlisters as they are not on our cable yet... ;-) Uhm, Dani, are you finished watching them...? :-#

Have fun, hugs to you all.

Elvis lives!

2008-10-01T11:39:00.003+02:00

If it wasn't so sad it actually would be funny: a hacker was able to fool the system that reads electronic passports at Amsterdam airport. He was able to let the system read a manipulated passport and the system did accept the false ID without any problem. So all the security hype (especially of the americans) about stricter controls with electronic passports is basically for nothing... it does not even seem too complicated to do that as the hacker even demonstrates on his website in a video:

When I see this it really makes me angry as the authorities always make you believe it's for my own best and protection and blablabla... but it's not safe and it's only costing a lot of money for nothing - it's all about pure cosmetics to simply fool the general (especially american travelling) public to make them think all became much safer and the government has everything under control - not...

A hug.

A fresh new look, courtesy of Dani

2008-09-30T17:29:00.008+02:00

May I proudly present my new blog design to you?

I am pleased to announce that with immediate effect the look has been changed to a new template that was kindly designed and installed by my beloved and very talented lilbro Dani!

Since quite some time I wanted to change the look of my blog and bring up the first design change since I started this, not quite a year ago. I was trying to establish a three column design but I don't have a clue about these things if it's not drag & drop... So my lilbro kindly offered to help me and now came up with this splendid new design! I especially love the header which Dani designed for me as well. It's pretty cool and I love the resemblance in style with Dani's own blog.

I don't plan any further changes to the cruisair blog content, I am quite happy with what I have on it now. I might fine tune one or the other sidebar item but in general I have what I wanted.

I love it very much, I hope you all do too, lets give him a big round of applause (and I promised him something else as reward...hehehe)! Many many thanks Dani, I appreciate it so much - besitos!

Hugs for all of you.

If you can, you should do it.

2008-09-28T11:25:00.000+02:00

One of these days I received a mail from my friend Stewart. I was so much impressed by the video it linked to that I decided to rather make a post than to email it to only a few other friends.

It's a story of a father and a son. The story is about integration, it is about love, it is about abilities, it is about endurance, it is about strength, it is about believing, it is about so many things that you would never imagine this inspiration comes from them at first sight.

I would like to share this video here with you.

If you want to know more about Rick and Dick, you can read a little about their story here or go to their website Team Hoyt to learn all about them.

It is true, in so many ways: if you can, you should do it.

A hug.

I love typography.

2008-09-27T17:41:00.001+02:00

I think I haven't spoken about this topic so far but nevertheless this is something that I really like: typography. I find it absolutely fascinating to see different kinds of lettertypes being used in different kinds of media, like brochures, books, magazines but also online usage. I am neither talented enough nor have I the patience to design a lettertype myself (though it would be something that I find interesting) but reading about how famous lettertypes have been designed is very interesting. There are very creative people out there who have developped the most fascinating lettertypes. I don't always like those typefaces (sometimes they are so artistic that I cannot even read them anymore - but that's of course the purpose of a letter so I think that's more art than useable lettertype) but very often there are beautiful examples used for the most diverse purposes. As a child, in the pre-computer era, I loved to draw different lettertypes and "design" posters and stuff using different typefaces. That of course looked very unprofessional but with the introduction of computers and the different kinds of desktop publishing software this became faster, easier and looked more professional. Now the occasional letters and other print matters I create really look nice. Of course I have one favorite lettertype, or more actually... I wonder if my choice for a specific typeface says something about me... probably it does, I just wonder what... :-D Anyway, one of my favorites is the Lufthansa lettertype which is a special variation of the famous Helvetica lettertype, especially designed for the airline. It's a plain and clear lettertype which I prefer in general.

There are even books that deal only with the different kinds of lettertypes and present the types and their practical usage. Of course one of the blogs I read is about typography and of course it's called I love typography. They regularly publish wonderful photos and examples about the often interesting, sometimes beautiful application of lettertypes. Have a look at the blog and look what beautiful things can be done with simple letters, it's amazing. I just wish I had more knowledge and expertise to properly use the many different lettertypes that I managed to collect on my computer. Often enough, on the rare occasion that I can design something that involves lettertypes, I tend to use my preferred types in very traditional ways due to the lack of my design knowlege. Oh well, I still enjoy that creative side of me every once in a while. Usually it's only me or Jelle or some family or friends who get to see the results, seldom a "wider" audience when I create some slides for my work (to be used as a screensaver for our workstations) and very rarely I use it in creating photos for flickr.

Exclusive: Making a cheesecake with Dani

2008-09-25T10:41:00.017+02:00

I proudly present to you the exclusive photo report of the "Making of" of Dani's famous Philadelphia Creme cheesecake!

On a recent visit to the Master of Cheesecakes himself, Dani-chan treated us to a very exclusive insight view of the making of his famous cheese cake. I can assure you that the cake was as delicious as it looks on the photos! Try it out yourself. Of course there's nothing above the real original one but only few lucky ones get to taste him, er... it.

Let's start with the recipe, here's all the ingredients you will need to prepare it.

Also, this photo shows already the first step, the crunched cookies in the form that is used to make the cake.

Follow the recipe along and have a look at Dani's expert moves.

Again, if you don't know exactly how to crunch those cookies, here Dani shows you en detail. Let your imagination inspire you in the crunching process... ;-)

The cheese and other ingredients as per recipe (of course, mind the pronounciation...) have to be mixed and heated up.

Dani demonstrates how simple and easy this can be accomplished.

Some special powder thingie (hey, have a look at the recipe yourself, why do I need to do all the work?) needs to be mixed with milk and stirred perfectly before it can be added to the warming up cheese.

Make sure you mix all the stuff real good, don't leave the oven and prevent the milk/cheese mix to get burned!

As you can see, it is really easy if you follow the expert's tips!

If all is heated up well, stirred perfectly together you can then poor the fluid milk/cheese mix into the prepared form.

Mind you, what you see here is a variation of the original recipe. Don't get surprised that the crunched cookies will float up -

later you will see it won't be a problem for the finished cake, in contrast - it's the desired effect (well, hey, what do you think, here are the experts talking and cooking and showing!).

After the cake has been put into the fridge for hours (look at the recipe for the recommend time) you simply turn the cold and stiff cake with the form upside down - but don't forget to put a plate under it so you can place the cake on it... ;-)

Now, another creative part in the process of making the cheese cake starts: you have to decorate it! Again, use all your imagination. Our expert chef suggests - as you can see - a strawberry flavour element which gives the cake a wonderful red color. Other known variations (tried by your's truly himself) are a yellow jam, like peach or orange or such. That all depends on your personal taste. But that's the fun part, you can use whatever you fancy, isn't that great?! After it, you put some sliced almonds (or nuts, hey there's the creative variation again...) on top to finish the decorating process.

Guess what? You're done.

Put the Nespresso on, have a seat and enjoy!

Tadaaa! Our proud Dani, the cheese cake expert, with the final result!

Let me tell you, it was as fantastically delicious as it looks.

For cheese making courses please contact the chef himself, new trainings start each month and training classes are kept small in order to assure very personal attention to every participant! Apply immediately, I can only highly recommend his trainings - they are fun, excellent and delicious, what else do you want?

A cheesy hug to you all. :-P

Men in the shower

2008-09-25T07:04:00.000+02:00

Stress at work, feeling tension, need some relieve? Here's something exciting to watch... (be advised, some nudity involved...):

You did not expect something else, did you? :-P

Thoughts.

2008-09-23T23:24:00.003+02:00

No, nothing happened. But every now and then I fight with some feelings that are bothering me. I have to write a few words about it to get rid off it - well, I wish that would work like that... ;-) What I will write about does refer to my friends in general and is not referring to a specific friend.

A great exception though is Dani who is always there for me (be it by phone or chat or email or even in person or by his thoughts and even though he doubts that himself!). Also Franc is calling me and chatting to me more or less regularly and Katja who calls and visits a few times per year. I'm not being polite here, that's the way it is and how I feel about you. So guys if you read the following, it's not about you. ;-)

While I try since months to build up new and rebuild old friendships, find new friends, become more social I sometimes feel I make no efforts at all. You see, I sometimes call people (the least of my means of communication that I use I must admit), I more often send SMS, I once in a while send emails and I'm available for chat many hours of the day, more or less. But often enough, nothing happens. Of course I do know and understand people live their own lives and I know often enough the reason why people are so busy with their lives (e.g. new found loves)... but still, that does not prevent me from having that lonely feeling that I wanted to get rid off. So, sometimes I feel a bit sad that there are ten people present in the chat program and not a single one is interested in chatting to me. Of course I can pick any of them and initiate it myself, but friendship to me is a two way thing, isn't it? I'd sometimes love to be surprised by a warm email, a nice chat or SMS or even a call. To get the feeling one of my friends thinks of me... Jelle just said to me, maybe it's now paying back to me what I did to my friends years ago... well, maybe... but I don't really believe that. I know, I am impatient. This all takes time (a long time actually) but sometimes I'm really frustrated by things around me and then speaking to a friend could make all the difference. Jelle also mentioned to me that the fact that many of my new found friendships are "only" virtual make it maybe less serious friendships but I don't agree with that. Of course you can have superficial virtual friendships but I consider the "real" virtual friendships that I found good and serious ones. Nevertheless I try to make those virtual friendships "real" friendships by trying to meet the (usually) men and get to know them personally. The best of all friendships to me then develops when I speak, chat, listen, call, SMS, visit, see the one as much and regularly as possible - that luckily happened with Dani. Naturally, it's a logistical problem in real life to meet regularly if you do not live in the same city, I understand that. Finding more friends in my own city therefore would be an advantage but I haven't figured out yet how I want to do that.

Don't get me wrong - I am happy with the friends I found. I just miss your contact, I guess I'm in need of a lot of attention and unfortunately I cannot get it as much as I want to. I do enjoy regular chats with some of you, like Russell and Alejandro. It's really a pleasure to turn to you and speak. But that doesn't replace "real" friendships and that's what I miss. For example, for me it's important to have something to look forward to in my life. Some event to live up to, well, look forward to. Like going to meet someone, going on a vacation, meet with a friend, go watch a movie, have a coffee, eat dinner... to be honest, there is nothing at the moment or in the near future that I can look forward to. Sure, there is a training in November that I have to follow for two weeks in Zurich. But to be honest I am a bit "scared" about the thought, being away from home, the possibility to contact someone by computer, being on my own, knowing nobody, being cut off from MY world. I'm not too shy to speak to the colleagues there but I know I will feel lonely and that's certainly not an idea I am looking forward to. Of course there is the plan to make a day trip with Franc some time soon or go to see a movie with him, but nothing fixed yet. All these things (and probably a few more) add to my overall feeling and I hope that explains a little why I sometimes can feel really down.

I am glad I wrote a few words about this. Honestly, I feel better. But most of all it helped speaking to a friend. Thanks lilbro for lending me your ear once again.

Lots of hugs and kisses to you all.

P.S.: Dani, you know why I exempt you from the above? It's very simple. Don't forget that we are in contact very very often. You always try to say at least a few words to me as you often know how important it is for me. You often respond to emails I sent you. You do that despite the fact that you are very busy these days and don't get treated well either but still you manage to think of me and show your support to me. So for that reason don't worry if you not always answer every SMS or email - the things you do are so much that they easily compensate for what you think you lack to do (which you don't). I do feel guilty that you probably feel a certain pressure from me, that I make your life just a little more complicated than it could be. But maybe it becomes a little easier when I tell you that it's sometimes that simple smiley from you that makes all the difference for me, the "virtual" kisses you send or the hugs you give or that friendly, cheerful comment you make or just that smile and your laugh I can hear through the telephone that make me smile too, cheer me up, make my day!

I honestly appreciate all you do, as you said yourself, that's what friends are for and I am most fortunate that fate brought us together.

Needless to say, I try to be just that for you too. Maybe that's the reason why I call you more often than you would normally expect. I am probably just trying to compensate for lack of other (direct) communication. After all, I am interested in your life as well and I want to hear what happens to you too. I know there is a difference of some kilometers between us and somehow I strive to bridge that distance. So bear with your bigbro ;-)

P.P.S.: it really felt good to hear Sera's voice, I was very happy to hear him say "Hi" in the background! Please tell him he always has a very positive effect on my mood too!

P.P.P.S.: Damn mobile phones! :-)

Bello por dentro...

2008-09-23T06:23:00.001+02:00

...vello por fuera! :-P

This is the first result of my "Project Grandpa" - Dani, Jelle and I went shopping in Madrid to look for some more modern or contemporary clothes for me... of course and as usual Dani as well as Jelle found nice t-shirts except for me, typical! But then, one evening in Chueca we passed a sex shop (!) and they had at least this nice shirt for me! So finally, the first step is made - for future developments watch my flickr space (there's even a special set!)... ;-)

I'm curious to see the results during the coming months... hehehe

Any suggestions from your side? I welcome your inspirations while I await the next shopping tour with my mate Dani, who's not only my best friend but also personal adviser in this giant project... :-D

A hug from grandpa.

P.S.: Sorry to those who already saw this on flickr - I liked the idea so much so I decided to make a blog post of it too. ;-)

Compiling.

2008-09-22T07:30:00.000+02:00

"Compiling" © xkcd

I swear this came up randomly! With a special dedication to Dani... :-P

The Rain In Spain Falls Mainly On McCain (from: Joe.My.God.)

2008-09-21T00:02:00.003+02:00

There is a "revealing" post over at Joe.My.God. about Mr. McCain. He was interviewed by a spanish radio station and the interview did not exactly turn out to be very flattering for Mr. McCain's knowledge about world politics in general and Spain in particular. :-D

I'm shocked, no, on second thoughts no I'm not... it doesn't really surprise me that Mr. McCain is as ...uhm...let's say 'uneducated' as I feared he might possibly be:

Click here for the interesting post!

A friendly hug.

Happy Birthday!

2008-09-20T00:01:00.001+02:00

It's Sera's birthday today and Jelle and I extend our warmest and sincere wishes to him: Happy Birthday Sera! Many kisses from us! Hopefully you'll get lots and lots of tasty chocolate bears (at least as big as the one in the shopping window in Berlin). ;-) Many happy times for you together with your hubby Dani! Lots of love from us!

Guido and Jelle

Funny.

2008-09-19T12:52:00.005+02:00

"Names" by xkcd. More here.

Seen there.

Those were the days...

2008-09-19T08:01:00.000+02:00

It's been a while (how many days exactly...?) since I last posted something about aviation. Then again, it's one of my passions and I don't carry that a i r in my nickname for nothing... so here we go, another round of videos to share some airline nostalgia with you:

The first video is from an airline that most of you probably don't know if you are not interested in airlines and stuff: Wien Air Alaska. As a kid, the name always fascinated me and I always wondered where it came from. Because you must know that "Wien" in German is the name of the capital of Austria, Vienna. So you can imagine that I was pretty confused as a child what Vienna had to do with an airline in Alaska... ;-) After all, at that time there was no internet to look up all the facts...

The next commercial is of one of the former major airlines I unfortunately never managed to fly (yeah, us airline geeks "collect" flights and airlines and routes and types... no, don't bother to comment, I know I'm nuts...): Eastern Airlines

Neither have I flown on this one: Republic Airlines. They have been absorbed by Northwest Orient Airlines back then and I have flown them... but that doesn't really count, does it?

I just mentioned them before and yay, I managed to fly them! Even better, I love this commercial as they obviously have been a trendsetter: to ban smoking on planes - hooray for that!

...and OH MY GOD is this terrible, a commercial that looks as if a school class has thought of the plot and made the film...

Esthetically one of the beautiful commercials and I will 'love' United Airlines forever for their wonderful slogan "Come fly the friendly skies" and the use of Gershwin's "Rhapsody in blue" since ages in their commercials and on the telephone... ahhh... airline advertising the way I love it:

From the same airline here is a more vintage commercial, promoting the then brand new DC1o aircraft - look at the lounge in Economy class!!! Unthinkable of in today's hard economic times...

In an effort to differentiate themselves from their competition, Braniff Airlines declared the end of the plain plane. In the end, it did not help and today, the airline has long disappeared from the skies, no more BIG ORANGE (their bright orange coloured 747 jumbo jets) coming in to land at an airport near you...

Maybe the next airline has indeed been doing best what they did - they are still around and are comparatively healthy for an american airline. I always liked their color scheme, the classic ultra clean typeface, the silver bare metal colored fleet of aircraft and the use of the american colors white, blue and red:

And look at this marvel: TWA! Yes, I've flown them but not on the aircraft they advertise as brand new in this commercial, the L1011. Look at the spacious economy class cabin, again something that you will not find on any of today's airlines. Or look at the meal service: a full (giant) tray with a steak on it! Unbelievable! Nowadays, on some airlines like United you now even have to pay for a meal in Business class (on some flights)! Awww.... those were the times...

Well, I hope you enjoyed my little walk through airline commercials archives. If not, may I suggest to read any of my other non-aviation posts instead? Or maybe have a look at my blogger friends' recent posts? Check out their sites and click on the links provided to the right.

Thanks for your interest anyway and come back soon.

A bear hug.

This post was inspired by an article I read here.

Cornerstones

2008-09-18T15:07:00.003+02:00

I few words about me. It's been a while I think that I wrote about myself and my feelings. As far as I see it I am "improving" on my "mental stability". That's a good thing. About two months ago I read a blog post that made me think about my own postings. Very recently I read another post on the same blog and both posts for me are somehow connected as they are both about a person's feelings and emotions and the way (or not) to write about them.

Sometimes I have something on my mind. I want to talk about it but can't because there is nobody to talk to. Sure, we all chat a lot all day long, about God and the world and all the non important, meaningless things that surround us. I have a few people I more or less chat with on a regular basis. Usually, those chats always stay on the surface, they seldom manage to get deeper. That's the nature of a chat I guess, quick and short talks on the one hand, the restriction of it to often taking place at work is another one I assume. At least that's my experience. But back to what I wanted to say. So if I want to express something to somebody who's not there, I can turn to my blog. Write - like now - about my thoughts. When I write here I realize that I indirectly speak to those very few readers I have. Sometimes -I admit - I intend to do that in order to receive a reaction, sometimes I don't and just want to share my thoughts. Usually, the urge for me to write something about my emotions arises when I lack the possibility to speak about them. But what triggers certain emotions, you might wonder? Well, I don't exactly know for sure myself.

Let me take a look at myself where I see the "problem" for the most part. I am still a very insecure person, even though that might not occur to the occasional reader. I have very few friends and therefore social contacts. I am still in the process of building up a new social network for me. So if one element in my existing network "fails" for whatever reason I only have a small back-up option. The "problem" with friends of course is that they are not made for my personal well being and entertainment. They have a live of their own. But they are the cornerstones on which I build my network. I rely on them, on some more than on others. That's probably the reason why I tend to be very possessive and claiming, trying to ensure the all-time availability of my friends, especially my favorite ones. Now that's where I wonder if that is repelling them from me; the more I claim, the more they get repelling - could that be? That seems logical. If I give any of my friends that feeling, putting that burden on them, I truly regret that. It's not my intention.

Hack, I regularly have things to tell, personal things. I try to do things to make my life better and I want to tell you about it. Because you are part of my very personal life. And I want to know the personal stuff from you too, because I am part of your personal life. That's what a blog and a chat is not about but a friendship. There are things that you preferably share with your best friend(s) and not your hubby. That's why we need to call and see each other often. Some things deserve privacy. Even if those things are not moving the world, yet they mean something to us and I think we should share them. Personal interaction, be it virtual via a (skype) call or even better with a cup of coffee around the corner is the best method to build and deepen that friendship. I always hope you will feel the same. Thinking about it, that's definitely not claiming, is it?...

Anyway, I have tried to explain a little what moves me lately. I know it is kind of weird and I am not a good writer, especially when it comes to expressing my emotions. But I feel I need to share this with you, try to explain and make you understand why I am the way I am or why I do or don't do certain things. On the other hand I hope you will guide me in finding the right balance in interacting with you, to be part of your lives and yet don't feel excluded. I still need that help from you all.

A big hug to my wonderful friends, new ones and the ones I found back, the cornerstones of my social network.

Google for gays?

2008-09-18T14:33:00.004+02:00

A german site that looks like google and works based on google aims to be the google for (german) gays: Schwuugle (pronounced like 'shwoogle'). "Schwul" (pronounced like 'shwool') in german means "gay" so it's a nice play of words for the site's name. There is a team that screens all the sites to make sure their content really is gay and but not only about porn.

At the moment, 1.250000 sites are included that are somehow related to gay men. For the time being, the site restricts itself on gay men but claims to be working on a lesbian version (or inclusion?) too. I thought it's kind of interesting though I don't know if it's really necessary and if I cannot find what I am looking for in google as well, with more or less the same effort. I haven't tested that. The only "advantage" seems to be that schwuugle-sites are sure to be gay, obviously... if you must have that assurance.

To hell?

2008-09-18T06:41:00.000+02:00

Eskimo: "If I did not know about God and sin, would I go to hell?"
Priest: "No, not if you did not know."
Eskimo: "Then why did you tell me?"

There is something about Guido

2008-09-17T02:24:00.004+02:00

This is funny: by chance I saw this post on the blog of Rafalet and I was playing with the thought of using it here too. For some reason I knew my friend Dani would most probably do it too and when I saw it appear on his blog I decided to go for it too. As you will guess, this is a parody of a ficticious interview that spanish "journalist" Maria Patino is about take with me. As Rafalet and Dani encouraged already, I will do too: please feel free to put it in your blog too (amended to your personal situation, that is)...

Hi Guido, how about talking about you?

Oh well, why not. It might be funny... It feels strange though, I'm not someone interesting. There is nothing special about me, nothing that others might want to know.

How did you decide about your nickname? In case you use your real name why do you use it?

Well, I have explained that a while ago in my blog. But in case you don't remember I am happy to refresh your memory: I like cruising (with ships, mind you) and I like airplanes. So I combined the two and I liked the double meaning of "Cruisair" (as in Cruiser...). I wanted a name that did not contain numbers and I did not want to use my real name as it's too boring... My first choice for a nick was taken: Gayviator, I liked that a lot. But now I got used to the Cruisair and I started to like it.

Would you make a wish to the stars?

Yes, definitely. Way too many things probably but still... I'm a romantic so that's why I guess...

When was the last time you cried?

I do cry occasionally. The last time was when I watched the movie "Moulin Rouge" but also when my dearest friend did something beautiful that made me happy.

Bread with...?

Butter, definitely. Plus one of the following: Herz Salami from Hungary, the original one. I just love it. Or Bierwurst (oh, it's so german, but that has always been my favorite). Or Nutella.

Do you like animals?

That depends, are we talking pets? As a kid I loved when the neighbour's cat always came to us and lay down in my lap, I adored that. My mom once brought home a budgerigar. I loved it but never took care of it... The friend of my aunt where I went very often as a child had a dog like Lassie, I loved that too. But I have been to someone who had a dog and the whole house stank because of the dog... I thought that was disgusting... So I guess I tend to a cat... The only thing about them all: I am so self centred and am afraid to forget to take good care of a pet...

How many children do you have?

I know for sure I don't have any. Never have, never will. You talk about these little creatures that scream and get on your nerves, right?

Do you work together with NGOs?

No, I don't.

If you were another person, would you be your friend?

Hm... difficult question. I often wonder why someone is my friend. Why do people like me, for what? What is likeable about me? But I think yes, I would want to be my friend.

Do you have a diary?

No, not really. I do have this blog but I don't really consider it as my diary. As a kid I had a diary at school. All the girls had one so I wanted to have one too. Naturally, I was the only boy to have one...

Are you sarcastic?

No, usually I'm not. I can be very ironic though but never really sarcastic...

Would you do bungee jumping?

That is really something I wouldn't do lighthearted. It's not something I always wanted to do. There might be circumstances that I ever might do it but I can't imagine it right now...

Which cereal do you prefer?

Oh I don't know their name but it's those wheat thingies with a raisin inside, I just love them, combined with fresh banana and sugar and milk...

Would you unzip shoes before you remove them?

Yes, it drives me crazy to have to open them when I want to put them on...

Do you think you're strong?

In all aspects, I'm not. Physically, I'm weak and mentally I'm not strong either.

What is your favorite icecream?

Banana. Or Pistacchio? Wait, maybe Hazelnut? Hmm... no I'll go for Banana.

Which shoesize do you have?

I have size 45. I know what they say about men with large feet, or men with long noses... I won't comment on that so don't go there...

Red or pink?

Pink, I have to modernize myself.

Sea or mountains?

I love both! What I don't like is to sit on a beach all day long, just sunbathing is not for me. Megahikes in the mountains is not for me either but I do love to walks, I enjoy the company of a good friend and I adore the nature. I love to be at secluded places, where I am alone and no one or not many people around except someone really special.

What do you like the least about you?

Not to have enough self confidence; many missed chances in my life; not to have enough courage to always stand-up for my opinion; my teeth; some more physical aspects...; many more things...

Whom do you miss much?

Apart from my parents my best friend.

What color do your trousers and shoes have at your job?

Dark blue trousers and black shoes. Hey, I wear a uniform at work.

The last you ate today?

Some Milka chocolate, but as dinner I had rice and green curry (prefab meal from the supermarket, but very good).

What are you listening right now?

It's late in the night, no music anymore. Jelle left the tv on and now in the background there is endless advertising for telephone sex... The last song I heard today was from Mecano, "El Uno, el Dos, el Tres".

Who was the last person you talked to on the phone?

I don't know hardly any people, no one ever calls me. The last calls were the ones I made myself and today it was my father that I called. I'm lucky if I get an SMS every once in a while.

Your favorite drink?

Milk. Full fat, 3.5%, nothing less. 1 litre, daily.

Favorite sport to watch on television?

I don't like tv. I'm like Churchill who said "No sports". So what worse combination can there be than tv and sports? But if you tie me to a chair in front of a tv and I have to choose, well, for heaven's sake, then give me something like male wrestling... I love to see hairy and beefy men in tight suits grabbing their... oh sorry, I'm getting carried away...

Food?

Salad, pasta or bread. I love salad, in all forms. My favorite is butterhead lettuce.

Happy ending or...?

Yeah, as I said before, I'm a romantic. So a happy ending is almost a must for me... but seriously, it all depends on the story, I can handle both...

Do you have pets?

No, poor creatures... see above

Favorite day of the year?

All the days that I can make a loved one happy.

Kisses or hugs?

Both, I can't get enough of kissing! I love kissing long and a lot! And hugging, I love hugging long and a lot! And I miss both, any male volunteers?

Are you a happy person?

At times.

Who do you think will respond?

No one. Almost no one is reading this. Who bothers about this anyway?

What book are you reading?

I still have to read the Death Note, there are several books in the shelf waiting (like an interesting one by a gay german tv host who describes his "pilgrimage" to Santiago de Compostela) but I spend way too much time on internet, sadly...

What is your favorite color?

Blue. In all it's shades.

What did you watch on TV last night?

I usually don't watch tv. I went to the cinema last night to see Mamma Mia for the second time.

Rolling Stones or Beatles?

Well, they are both not my favorite. If I really have to make a choice then I choose the Beatles but that doesn't mean I like them.

How do you see the glass?

Half empty.

What is the farthest place you have been from home?

That depends: Looking west it was Aitutaki, the Cook Islands and looking east it was Fiji.

Do you do sports?

Hey, do you listen? Churchill, remember?! No sports!

From where do you write?

From my living room at home.

MILK

2008-09-17T01:42:00.000+02:00

David, the friend who's living in the U.S. recently pointed my attention to a new movie that will premiere in the U.S. in November. I'm very interested to see it as it's telling an important story:

What the gays are watching: The Golden Politics

2008-09-16T01:21:00.001+02:00

My friend David from the U.S. lately sent me a link to this blog where I found this video which I wanted to share here with you. ;-)

And while I'm at it, here's another very nice one about american politics - enjoy... :-)

A hug.

Home away from home.

2008-09-14T13:45:00.009+02:00

I am on vacation.

Since the beginning of this month I'm off. Yay. I enjoy it a lot, despite not going to far away places. Usually, Jelle and I like to go to far off places and travel around the world. We also had planned something pretty weird this time - flying the A380 - but it would have cost us too much money in too little time. So we cancelled that in order to do it some other time when we have more time to enjoy it and when we can afford it. But this time, there was no money for this luxury. So we more or less stay home. But of course that can be nice too and frankly, for the time being I am enjoying it. Doing nothing, no obligations, no early shifts, sleeping long and enjoying the day. Only to return to work end of next week, woohoo!!!

Nevertheless, we have been away in this vacation. Hooray! My lilbro Dani invited us to come visit him in Madrid and spend some time with him. And man did I enjoy it! Dani did his utmost to make this visit extra special as it was Jelle's first time ever to visit Madrid. So Dani showed us around everywhere and we now know all the in's and out's of that fantastic city! Jelle immediately fell in love with Madrid! He loved it just like I already learned to love it long before him. The best though of our trip was simply to be and spend the time with the best of all friends, my Dani - there's nothing more beautiful than to enjoy such a friendship that we share!

So we headed for Spain on the second of this month. We took a plane to Frankfurt (which had a "bad" start as our colleagues did not arrange for us to have a meal during the short flight - no big deal but still, we are paying for that and it often happens to us. It's a little effort to arrange that yet some colleagues just don't care... a pity...).

Me, on the flight to Frankfurt

From Frankfurt, we went to Bilbao. We stayed in a suburb in a Novotel and though the weather could have been nicer we enjoyed the city. It was well worth the trip, strolling through the nice center,

Jelle in Bilbao's city center

the old town, the famous Guggenheim Museum. We even took a train (yeah, we like trains and planes and ships...) to the countryside just to see the surroundings of the city.

Jelle pointing to the train we wanted to take for a short ride

On the fourth, we went to the airport again to take a Spanair flight to Madrid. The Bilbao airport architecture is quite interesting so I enjoyed taking some photos of it before we headed for the gate. Jelle decided to have a wine before take-off while I only had a coffee and we could not believe our ears when we paid: together it was less than 3 Euros, in an airport restaurant - and the wine was even cheaper than my coffee! That's simply amazing! Our flight to Madrid was eventless, we got seats right at the check-in in Business class and the flight turned out to be pretty empty. Good for us. ;-)

Handsome lilbro Dani right after we met again

Then we arrived in Madrid and I could almost not await to see my lilbro again! I really looked so much forward to see Dani!!! We had planned our arrival into Madrid for the early afternoon, about the same time that Dani would finish work. As Dani had to attend to some business at short notice in the northern part of the city it became quite convenient to meet there before his appointment. Of course we were all happy to see each other again and immediately started chatting endlessly... ;-) Unfortunately, we were not complete as Sera was not with us as he was still on vacation in his village in southern Spain. The plan was for Sera to join us later during our visit to which I was also looking forward!

Alex, Dani and me in Madrid's center

Later that day we met Alex, a friend of Dani, with whom we had some pre-dinner drinks and later Sera's sister Rosa joined us and we all went to a fabulous and very popular restaurant place in the center of Madrid where we had a truly excellent meal! And we all liked the receptionist of the place who was a hottie... :-) It was a true pleasure to meet Alex, as I had heard about him already but had not met him before. He perfectly speaks german too and it was fun and very enjoyable with him. I am glad to have met him.

Alex (junior) and iPhonero Dani

Seeing Rosa again was a blast, she is such a sweetheart, very funny and it was truly awesome to meet her again as the last time I saw her was during Orgullo gay. I wish she would've brought her brother too... ;-)

We were staying at Dani's house and my lilbro insisted on giving us his bedroom for the night but after lengthy discussions we could convince him it was not necessary at all. ;-) We were really fine with the guest bed in his 2nd bedroom, it was simply perfect and I did sleep very well during our stay. In fact, I felt at home immediately. Dani made us feel so comfortable! Staying at his house did feel like staying at my own house, Dani has the gift of making you feel extremely comfortable in his presence.

Poor Dani still had one day of work ahead while we were able to have a long sleep and instead of going into Madrid we decided to stay at Dani's house, relax, enjoy ourselves and have a nice cup of coffee in the sun in the small bar downstairs at his house waiting for him to arrive home. Little things like that can be so enjoyable and great, it truly felt like a vacation in the most luxurious resort on earth ;-) In the afternoon, unfortunately for him after some overwork, Dani arrived home and we were ready for the days ahead together, yay! Later the evening we met with Dani's mother and aunt and went to the village's local yearly fair where the highlight was a concert of the fabulous "La 5a estación" - we had a great night with with fabulous music, food and friends! I enjoyed it sooo much, really!

Natalia of "La 5a Estación" during their concert in Valdemoro

The next day Dani took us (well, I had seen it already on a previous visit with Dani) to Aranjuez where we had a brief stroll and after returning we were invited by Dani's mother to a real "codido madrileño" which to me was a true culinary delight! I really loved it and it was such a great gesture of her to invite us and specially prepare this meal for us, I am so thankful for that! Juan Carlos, one of Dani's close friends, had joined us for it too and we all had a wonderful lunch together. After that, we devoted the whole afternoon and evening to Madrid itself. We went to Park Retiro and leisurely walked all the way from there through the city center, Dani showing Jelle all the beautiful sights his hometown has to offer! We had great weather and it was such a great day.

Jelle, Dani and me posing in front of the Royal Palace in Madrid

Later in the evening we met Juan Carlos again. He took over the sightseeing part from Dani and explained the sights we visited together while the sun was setting over Madrid. What a beautiful evening, we had a great time and - you guessed it - we enjoyed a very good meal altogether and later went to Chueca to enjoy the bustling nightlife of the city! It was great for me to see Juan Carlos again, I really like him and he is such a pleasant company!

Juan Carlos, me and Dani with Madrid's evening skyline

For Jelle and me it was such a fascinating thing to sit in the center of Chueca, after midnight, outside in a street cafe and have a drink. Everything was so full and we almost did not get a table, unbelievable but such a great and fun atmosphere. Jelle and I agree that this is the ideal place for us, the life takes place much later and we truly prefer that above our "sleepy" Amsterdam ;-) We absolutely loved the atmosphere in Chueca and Madrid in general, as I said before Jelle truly loves the city now!

Jelle in Chueca

Dani did not rest and took us to a famous street market the next day where we tried to do some shopping. I am in urgent need of revamping my outfit, modernize myself a little. After all, my lilbro things I'm a bit grandpa-ish and I think he's right... ;-) So the aim was to find some nice things in the afternoon and of course Dani and Jelle found some nice stuff but of course I didn't!!! Luckily, Dani promised to take me for "real" shopping next time so I can really update my clothes. I'm looking forward to that, lilbro. ;-) Later that day we met Alex again together with his boyfriend Alex (yeah, "junior" and "senior" as they are referred to by their friends...) ;-) for a quick drink in the center.

Me and Alex (senior and junior) :-)

In the meantime, Sera had returned from his vacation and finally joined us in the evening and we spent great quality time together, Dani and Sera and Jelle and me!

Sera and Dani, after we had breakfast

The next day Dani suggested to go see Toledo and we spent a beautiful day at this gorgeous medieval city. It was a very nice trip and a great day we spent there.

Me and Dani with Toledo in the background

Later in the evening we were treated once again to a culinary highlight, Dani took us to one of his favorite restaurants, in the heart of Chueca! It was such a great place, very cosy with outstanding service, friendly staff, delicious food and perfect atmosphere. Rosa, Sera, Dani, Jelle and I truly enjoyed this treat and I felt very privileged that my lilbro did bring us to this place with so much atmosphere and quality!

Me, Rosa, Dani, Sera and Jelle at Dani's favourite restaurant in Chueca.

On the way home we ended the night once again in the heart of Chueca with a drink way after midnight out in the open amongst so many other people there, oh how I love Madrid and it's nightlife!

Sadly, our days in Madrid ended and we had to leave, heading home again. Dani and Sera had to return to work but our days with my lilbro in Madrid were fabulous! We watched a movie, bought lots of music CD's and some DVD's, we found some nice clothing, we went to a concert, we made some nice trips to the surroundings, had great food, met wonderful people, we enjoyed each other's company and I truly loved being around Dani and Sera and had the time of my life, once again, thanks to my lilbro! Honestly, I can't wait to go back to see him again ;-) I also hope to welcome them a.s.a.p. here in Amsterdam again... Please lilbro, come visit us again!

Me, Dani and Sera at Dani's home on his couch on the last morning of our visit.

Many, many thanks to you, dear lilbro, you have made our stay with you such an extraordinary experience! I can't express my gratitude well enough. A load of kisses and hugs to you, Dani.

I look forward to return to my home away from home - your house. There is no better hospitality than that of true friends, the ones that become family. Like my little brother.

Más que hacer

2008-09-14T01:32:00.005+02:00

Actually I should have included the following videos already in the previous post as they would have completed it, but anyway, here's the more of "Hacer por hacer":

The original, older version of Miguel Bosé's hit, which is just as great as the newly released remake:

Then I have found the "making of" of the new song. Actually, there are two versions: the first one shows the actual video shooting:

The second "making of" shows the singing part of the song which is quite nice to see Gloria Gaynor struggle with the spanish lyrics: see lilbro, now that's exactly the same problem I have with SingStar :-P But seriously, it's a nice look behind the scenes of the creation of this fabulous song:

If you look on youtube you can also find a live version of the original older song which only differs from the above in the sense that it has some additional cheering audience, the playback is the same original recording, therefore I did not bother to include that here.

As you can see, I really like this song and wanted to share more of it with you here... ;-)

P.S.: thanks Dani for showing it to me and also recommending Miguel's older CD.

Hacer por hacer

2008-09-10T12:47:00.002+02:00

When I was visiting Dani theses days (a separate post follows) he suggested this song to me. As Dani knows his bigbro pretty damn good he knew that I would LOVE this song: I really like Miguel Bosé and this song he recorded with Gloria Gaynor is an amazingly cheerful, fun dance song (look who's talking, I can't even dance!) and I simply adore it! Miguel Bosé is an attractive man and he has a wonderful voice and he perfectly knows how to modernize his own songs. The one thing I didn't like about it: I had to buy the whole Papito album (which I already own) that he has re-released just to include this new song! GRRRR. :-)

Finally, my iPhone

2008-08-30T08:32:00.001+02:00

Yesterday, my boyfriend Jelle and I finally picked up our new iPhone 3G, after a very long wait (we waited that the first hype vanished and we received a mail from t-mobile telling us normal availability of the gadget in their stores). Since we were already t-mobile customers the change of subscription was a breeze, the people in the t-mobile shop were very friendly, it all went without problems and our new iPhones are already activated (and quiet, my fans, my mobile number hasn't changed). There was not much homework to be done in iTunes to prepare for the big day so I am up and running right away.

I am happy with the new phone (I chose the black one, 16GB version): everything works (almost) perfectly and all those things (like internet on the go, GPS) are absolutely fascinating to me, especially since it's in such a small and most elegant device. During the next days, I will test which modes I will use as standard to optimize battery usage. Oh yeah, I tried and it even can make calls and send SMS... so fascinating....... hahaha
One thing I am struggling with is the synchronization with my address book on my iMac. The phone and the iMac have exchanged data but the content on the phone definitely differs from that on the iMac and I haven't figured out yet why there is a difference. I already experienced this with my iPod touch before but didn't look into that too much yet.

As for third party applications I started to add apps for facebook, flickr and the Apple remote. I have managed to add ringtones without paying for them. I have to inquire with my lilbro though to see how he does that 'cause I'm new to the whole "assign ringtone to specific callers" thing... ;-) I also added google talk and reader and an app for AIM. Though I would prefer a one-in-all app like Adium that I use on my iMac (I know there is one but that has some disadvantages...)

I am not going into details of the prices but I can say that we both took the most popular subscription plan which gives unlimited internet access within Holland, free access to all t-mobile hotspots in Holland, includes 150 minutes of calling and 150 SMS for about 30 Euros. On top of that, you pay the price for the iPhone like announced months ago by Steve... ;-) It may be a lot to some but I love it, I like being able to access internet when and where I want and am willing to pay the premium for it. Interestingly in the shop yesterday, one after the other bought the iPhone, it's like there are no other phones... funny.

My baby, the great Jelle, also already has his iPhone (though he has a white one) and we are now iPhoneconectados. I think he was looking forward to yesterday to finally go get it at the shop.

For my part (and that of Jelle) today we are happier than Marco after finding his mother (hell, I have no idea what this is about but for the sake of parody I had to include this into my post - after all, I join Finnegan in a parody of my beloved lilbro's post). :-D

A tragedy.

2008-08-21T01:17:00.004+02:00

Spanair Business class
Originally uploaded by CruisAir

Yesterday, unfortunately a flight of Spanair crashed during take off from Madrid's Barajas airport killing more than 150 people on board.
I would like to extend my deep felt condolences to the families of the victims.

My dearest Dani tried to call me to inform me about it but I was asleep after an early shift at work and did not hear him. But when I heard about the tragic news when Jelle called me from work to inform me it made me very sad. As some of you might know I work for a partner airline of Spanair and I must honestly say that it feels weird, so close suddenly. The older I get the more such tragic events touch me. Aviation is one of my hobbies and I am always interested in airlines and aircraft but this is sadly one of the very dark sides of this hobby, to deal with death and destruction, loss and grief. Even though for me it's only distant as an interested observer. But in this case it comes a little closer, for several reasons: I have flown a Spanair MD aircraft recently (it was a different version of the crashed aircraft) and the airline and the aircraft took me safely to my destiny: Madrid Barajas. I go to Madrid quite often lately to see my very dearest of all friends and naturally I am more alert in any sense of the word of all things that happen in Madrid. It interests me more, it touches me deeper, it affects me more. I am sometimes even frightened something terrible might happen to the ones I love there and I might not know about it, might not be able to do something about it. I pray it never will.
I did feel comfortable and safe though on the Spanair flight and I would fly them again, any time soon. Though I understand that some media are now speculating about possible maintenance issues due to job cuts to reduce costs at Spanair. That's purely speculating at this point and we will have to wait for the final report to see what crashed the plane.

I will think of the victims' souls this night, passengers' as well as those of my colleagues (even though not colleagues directly but like me they were airliners) who lost their lives and the souls of those who are left behind without their loved ones. It is impossible to understand the pain they must feel now but I will think of all of them tonight - I cannot change a bit but I want to express my sorrow. That's why I felt I had to write a few words about this tragedy.

What's in a name?

2008-08-18T15:10:00.003+02:00

Xavi of El diari del Xavi asked an interesting question: why or how did you choose your username? Here's the explanation for my choice:

I looked for a username that in any case should not contain a number, like 'Guido1967' or something like that, I hate those... Combinations with my name were mostly already taken or not nice and so I started looking into something independent from my real name/initials.

First of all, I like cruising... to go on a cruise ship that is... hence the "cruis" part of the username. The "air" part comes from my affection for all stuff airlines and the combination of both words sounds like "cruiser" which on one hand is what you are when you cruise and on the other hand has that ambiguous meaning to it... funny enough, I'm not a "cruiser" at all in the 'gay' sense of the word... hahaha

So, how did you choose your name and why?

Disruption.

2008-08-14T19:17:00.002+02:00

For those of you who actually come on my blog site directly to read it will notice there is some content missing on the sidebar. I was trying to change the look of my blog and that resulted in the loss of the content. I am currently trying to fix and repair it but that will take some time.

Sorry for the somewhat "unfinished" look. ;-)

For all reader users there should be no change or problem.

Happiness in my hand.

2008-08-12T14:42:00.002+02:00

Rose in hand
Originally uploaded by CruisAir

I had bought a little bouquet of roses for Jelle the other day. Just like that and because I hadn't done so in a long time. I think he was happy about it and that again made me happy, too! :-D

Today, this rose lost the head and i put it in water. I love the wonderful red color. I think it looks so wonderful and it perfectly symbolizes beauty to me. It made me happy to look at it. Then, I thought of you. This rose is for you. Just a little symbolic gesture from the distance to you to say "Don't worry" and to remind you that your love will overcome everything in the end. It's my photographic "comfort hug" to you. Many kisses, lilbro.

Thinking about this, I can say that happiness truly lies in my hands, always.

2008-08-11T23:09:00.001+02:00

My shadow
Originally uploaded by CruisAir

Shocking: Dani a real frequent traveller!

2008-08-07T17:04:00.000+02:00

After some intense and hard investigative research our news desk was finally able to confirm the shocking news that famous spanish blogger 'danoliverm' is indeed bearer of an Osooro platinum frequent traveller card! Probably in anticipation of our revealing news story today he posted a thread yesterday where he tries to play down his frequent travels which amount to numerous flights around the world this year alone. But hard facts - as can be seen in our photo - proof that he even is bearer of this Golden Bear card, which gives numerous privileges to the distinguished frequent bear traveller (as the card claims it is "...making frequent travelling bearable..."). Only far travelled and experienced bears are able to apply for this card and bearishness has to be proven to the card issuing organization! As can be seen in the photo we were able to get hold of his card for a few moments to make this shocking and revealing photo!

Interestingly, bearers of this card are entitled to a free subscription of Bear magazine, a free dvd of the movie "Cachorro", one free Coca-Cola Zero at participating bear bars around the world, unlimited free bear hugs from hot bears, 25 percent discount on bear toys from Amantis in Calle de Pelayo in Madrid, one hot tongue kiss per month from a bear of choice (12 per year, 1 extra as special limited offer) and many more exclusive offers to the bearer.

With awe I greet you, oh Dani you ruler, I send you an appreciative but shy kiss, a sheepish hug. :-)

P.S.: This post refers to Dani's post yesterday and is simply making fun of him. :-)

P.P.S.: Yeah, nuttybro' says: estoy loco! :-)

Face in the crowd

2008-08-04T11:27:00.003+02:00

Okay, this morning I discovered on iTunes this year's Symphonica in Rosso's anthem, a duet sung by Lionel Ritchie and Trijntje Oosterhuis, one of my most favorite female singers! I love the song and there is no real video yet as the concert is only in September but for the time being here's the song so you can at least listen to it. It's composed by John Ewbank and I'm pretty sure it's going to be a hit in Holland. I simply fall for this kind of music... ;-)

A child of love.

2008-07-31T15:26:00.002+02:00

Since a few days my parents tried to reach me. I had not called them since three weeks which honestly I did not realize. I am working fulltime, I have my own life and time flies when you're... well busy ;-) Anyway, to make a long story short... yesterday evening on my way home I called home and chatted for 45 minutes to my mom (god, I hope the cellphone costs aren't too bad to Germany from Holland...). I explained some things to her, mentioned that she had tried to call me during my spanish lesson when I could not respond, spoke about my search for new friends, told her I found the best friend I can imagine in my lilbro Dani and also about my doubts about myself and my constant need for confirmation of being loveable, being loved, being a friend...etc etc... a constant push up of my low self esteem to which she suddenly and totally unexpected by me replied and kind of joked that since I was a child of my loveable father and my loveable mother I was a loveable child of them! Which I thought was very cute of her to say and her way of trying to cheer me up. I was very happy about that! We talked a bit more and finally, to surprise me even more, out of nothing she said I should not worry, I was a child of love and not an accident. ;-) Something I cannot remember they ever told me but it made me really happy to hear. Not that I worried about that but the fact she said it and the way she did made me happy. I love my parents and now I even know I'm their child of love.

Primera lección.

2008-07-28T20:28:00.000+02:00

I am so excited! On tuesday, 29th of July, I will start my spanish lessons! Yay! I am really looking forward to learn a new language. I've had the thought for a little longer than a year but it took me until now to sign up for a real training course at a school here in Amsterdam. Apart from the few, yet important words like "guapo", "beso", "abrazo", "gracias" and "Bueons dias" I don't know anything about spanish. :-)
At school, many years ago, I did learn french (which I forgot for great parts again...) and the last language I learned was dutch. At the moment, I only speak german, english and dutch. But I figured it would be nice to be able to speak some basic spanish.
It regularly happens at work that spanish speakers ask simple questions which at the moment I cannot answer (yet). I also have some spanish speaking friends and even though they speak english it still would be nice to be able to do some basic talk to them in spanish.
So keep your fingers crossed and I hope I can rely on some of you for your assistance every once in a while ;-) And please be gentle with me and all the mistakes I will make in the beginning... I just hope I will be able to pick up a good pronunciation as that seems a very difficult part of the language to me. I hope I will have lots of opportunities to go to Spain and talk and listen to you guys down there, improving my spanish knowledge. Meanwhile, I will at least have different spanish blogs to follow as well as lots of beautiful spanish music to listen to which gives me plenty of opportunity to practice my language knowledge too.
Hopefully, in the future I can skip a look at google translator when I want to say things like "España, aquí yo vengo." :-D

My favorite...click...tv program as a child...click click

2008-07-26T02:07:00.000+02:00

I came across this intro to my favorite tv program of my childhood: Robbi, Tobbi und das Fliewatüüt! It's a german tv series, originally in four episodes, later re-edited and cut into 11 episodes and the film, uhm pardon me, the 'MAZ' (the german short for 'Magnetaufzeichung' which is 'video tape recording', very modern in 1972) was made by the inventor of the immensely popular tv program "Die Sendung mit der Maus" ("The program with the mouse"). It's based on a book published in 1967 (my year of birth) and it's about a little boy (Tobbi) from third grade at school who has invented a craft that can fly ("Flie" from "Fliegen" = to fly), swim ("Wa" from "Wasser" = water) and drive like a car ("Tüüt" is the sound car signals in Germany make) and who has a robot friend (Robbi). Robbi needs to pass an exam at his robot school and to help him Tobbi and Robbi go on some adventures to find answers to the exam questions. That's basically the story behind the series. If you look at it now it looks so outdated but to me looking at it, it has a lot of charme and I do have a lot of fond memories. I really love the series. Here's the very typical, 70's sound, theme song that was well known in Germany at the time.

There are a few more videos on youtube that show some excerpts from the actual series but of course that's in german only, but maybe if you're interested just click through and enjoy.

In any case I wanted to share this with you to show you a bit more about myself, so you get a little more insight in who "your's truly" is. I hope you liked it.

Here's my...click...big hug to...click...all of you...click click.

P.S.: You can even find some childhood photos of me here, in case you care.

Maybe I'm not that bad...

2008-07-24T02:10:00.000+02:00

Okay, here is my follow up to yesterday's post about myself: maybe I'm not that bad, after all... But hey, I was really overwhelmed at that moment and just couldn't handle all those emotions at the same time. So I felt very bad and useless. I know I'm not. I try to be a god son to my parents. But not calling them at the time they want does not make me a bad son, does it? ;-) I live my own life, I have my very own little problems and not sharing all of them with my parents again does not make me a bad son, or does it? ;-)
I decided not to share all things that bother me with them because it won't help me and doesn't make them happier. That doesn't mean I don't trust them or I exclude them from my life, it's just that I decided to live my own life and share only the things that they truly need to know.
I can still be a good son even if I only call after three weeks. I am interested in what happens to them. But I have my problems and have to deal with them as well, besides I am working full time. Yet, I want to live my life the way I want it - and I will do just that. But I will try in future to be a bit more considerate. I also want to be more in touch with them as I feel I now still have the chance before it's too late and I am without them. That is something I try to avoid thinking of as it makes me deeply sad. I do love my parents, from the bottom of my heart. So, maybe I'm not that bad...

I'm not a good son.

2008-07-23T11:46:00.000+02:00

I'm not a good son. I keep my parents excluded from most parts of my life. My mother is not well, since three weeks already. I haven't called them since then to inquire. This morning they called and naturally my dad said he was wondering why I haven't called. He suspects something is wrong. He wonders if it has to do with them, if they have done something wrong. I denied, it's nothing about them. It's about me. But they called shortly before I have to go to work. I don't have the time now to explain what's going on with me. They maybe deserve to know but on the other hand I don't want to bother them with my problems, they have enough themselves. So I didn't talk. Shortly after the call my dad called back, saying he doesn't feel comfortable, wanting to know if something is wrong with me and Jelle. I told him I can't talk about things now as I have to go to work. It didn't comfort him but he accepted it. I told him we will talk in the next days. Jelle managed to tear me even more down by agreeing with them. Of course he is right, they are right. But when I explained to him why I didn't call them, what my thoughts are he interrupted me and said I should explain to them, not to him. Wow, that's support. Thanks for that, exactly what I need. Now I go to work, feeling down, sad, guilty and facing probably 400 stranded angry people because of the strike of our pilots today. Just what I needed on top of that.
I'm not a good son, I should involve my parents more. I never really did. I can try. But I'm still searching for the answers to all of my questions, how can I explain to them what's wrong if I hardly know myself?
I do love them. I can trust them. Yet, I'm so concentrated on myself that I forget the world around me.
I am sorry.

Ugly.

2008-07-17T07:15:00.000+02:00

The following video shows a new built yacht of a young russian millionaire. The ship was designed by famous designer Philippe Starck but honestly: I've never seen a more ugly private yacht! So if you had a few hundred spare millions, would your private yacht look like this...?

Music and emotion

2008-07-15T11:46:00.000+02:00

Lately I figured out how to connect my stereo set to the Airport Express so I can play iTunes directly on my stereo (mind you, it's still not working wirelessly but at least I can use it now... sigh). Since then I enjoy listening to my favorite music via stereo which of course is a much more pleasant experience.
Not a new fact but something I again realized is the fact that music and emotion are closely connected. The songs I'm listening to at the moment are kind of soothing to my ear and soul. I feel comforted. For some reason I'm a bit sad since yesterday which I cannot explain. It feels good though to listen to the music which sort of feels like someone is gently fondling my head and body. Obviously it's something I long to receive and don't get, maybe that's why I'm sad. I have a wonderful collection of music that's romantic enough to make me feel good and dream away. ;-) As a kid I listen to the radio very often, nowadays I don't anymore. So new music rarely gets my attention. But luckily I have three people that have a big influence in my music taste.
First of all there's Jelle naturally who regularly lets me know one or the other song he heard on the radio (at work) and that's obviously a popular song at that moment - so he's kinda keeping me up to date. We also have a similar music taste and share quite some artists and songs we like. The one song I associate the most with Jelle is one he presented to me right in the beginning of our relationship. It's sung by Paul de Leeuw, a very popular gay dutch tv host and it's called "Ik heb je lief", which translates into "I love you". It's very dear to me listening to it and makes me happy.
Then there is Timo. Timo and I don't have a big common music taste. We both love eurovision songs but that's about it, with a few exceptions. His music taste is completely different from mine. But the one thing Timo does is to introduce me to music he likes and that in turn introduces me to new and to me unknown artists and songs. Sometimes I discover marvels and can add new artists and songs to my library.
Last but not least there is Dani. My lilbro probably has the biggest influence on my music taste at the moment. We have a very similar music taste and he opened a whole new world of fantastic spanish pop music to me. We both love film music (the soundtracks) and he regularly introduces me to new music of which he knows I am going to like it. After all, we are almost brothers... ;-) I'd love to sing along the songs which mostly is not possible yet as I don't know spanish yet and in contrast to him I cannot memorize all the lyrics that easily. But it's great fun and I enjoy it a lot when he sings as I think he has a wonderful voice that I like to listen to. Dani even managed to dedicate a song to me which every time I listen to it makes me cry. This only proves how close music and emotion are I think.
Now that I've listened a while to music while writing this post I can notice that my mood improved a little. It's really amazing what effect a few notes, in the right order played on the right instruments can have on your soul. I really admire people who have the ability of playing any kind of instrument. It must be such a gift to be able to produce music that will be so important for a multitude of reasons to others. Interestingly, I am the kind of person that mainly listens to the music itself as I don't understand the lyrics in most cases. The lyrics of most of the spanish music I lately mostly listen to is unknown to me. Understandably Dani cannot translate each and every song to me (though he would love to, knowing him). I know some of them and the ones I know become even more interesting once you know what the song is about. But still the music alone is magic enough of most songs to have an effect on me, even without knowing the lyrics. Maybe because most music I listen to is not sung in german I tend to ignore the lyrics in the first instance. Even with english lyrics I can easily ignore them and purely enjoy the music itself. I also love soundtracks of movies which in most cases are instrumental and to me listening to the pure sound can usually carry me away into a different world.
Timo is busy lately and we seldom chat at the moment. I know the reason why and perfectly understand. Jörg is happily in love as is Mika and you figured it that love is all around... :-) There simply is no friend near me. Of course there is Jelle but it's the situation I was in when I started to change my life. It feels like only Jelle and me. The circle is round again. I guess I feel a bit lonely lately. Music then can be a good companion for a while. I know it will change again, some time. Until then, as I feel exhausted, I will flee into that wonderful world that music creates. I can feel the gentle fondle of your tunes, the happy swing of your melody, I'm dreaming away, I feel better already...

"When you need a healer for your pain
I will be there time and time again
When you need someone to love you
here I am"

Hugs to you all.

Little inadequacies

2008-07-14T11:28:00.001+02:00

It's strange, the other day I noticed something of my personality that is kind of a contradiction. The ones reading here and having 'friend' status on flickr know that I sometimes post some photos of myself that are quite revealing. I somehow like to do that and through the "protection" of the internet (feeling anonymous, more or less) I feel secure enough to do it. I don't feel embarrassed or something. I am in control to what I post, who can see it and for how long. It's also kind of a way for me to getting used to myself and being seen by others and getting more confidence in that. But then - and that's the contradiction - I was in Madrid, visiting Dani. During the gay pride parade I took this photo of Dani and his bigbro Juan Carlos and afterwards Dani took my camera and asked me to take of my shirt too but I was much too afraid and embarrassed to do that among all those people, I felt extremely insecure at that moment and maybe even frightened. On the other hand, I regretted immediately afterwards that I never got to know the picture Dani wanted to take. What a pity.

Little inadequacies...

When we strolled through the Chueca district on one of those fine days my beloved Dani was so kind to buy me some little presents. Just a little something but still so precious to me! But I didn't show it, I didn't even thank him enough! I kind of took it for granted and it's not! It was such a lovely gesture and simply wonderful. And honestly, I feel awful I never show him how much I care for him and all the little things he does nor did I really thank him for the presents he gave me. I realized that when I saw how his bigbro Juan Carlos reacted towards him when he received a little present as well. That was so full of gratitude and love and I admired both for that. In my heart, I did the same. It's just my actions that did not match my feelings. The same happened yesterday, my friend Katja had brought a little present. A bottle of our favorite liqeur which you can only get at the Lufthansa crew shop in Frankfurt. She made the extra effort to go there especially for us. And she even remembered we like it! And though I was very happy to receive it and thanked her for it, in retrospect I think I could have shown more gratitude towards her.

Little inadequacies...

I am trying to change this. I want to show how happy I am about receiving something from my loved ones. Whether it's a postcard, a button, a cd or whatever one decides to present to me. It doesn't really matter what it is, it's simply the thought, the gesture that counts the most and which shows how much my friends and family care about and love me. To know that is what matters most to me. I will try in future to show my gratitude towards you, my beloved friends and family, more open and with more affection. I think it can't be bad to show more of my emotions, I am still much too afraid to hug and kiss you, to even only touch you. I can do it with words but not with my hands or lips. I will work on that.

Little inadequacies...

Back from Orgullo gay

2008-07-09T23:14:00.002+02:00

Dani lifts Guido
Originally uploaded by CruisAir

Orgullo gay in Madrid was great! I spent a wonderful time with my lilbro Dani and his lovely husbear Sera. I again met many of their friends who are with no exception wonderful people! We spent some wonderful days together, I enjoyed every single second! The weather during my stay in Madrid couldn't have been any better, it was hot with a clear blue sky, really beautiful! In enjoyed seeing so many beautiful men and people in general. I had the impression that it was a real 'party' for everyone. I saw young and old people, gays and obviously not gays and that gave a very good and pleasant feeling of "being part" of the community, not just a minority. Thank you Sera and Dani once again for being so wonderful to me. When I left, it was really hard for me as I felt so pleasant and comfortable in your company, you made me so happy just by being the wonderful people you are. I owe you guys big time. I hope to see you soon again, hopefully for gay pride in Amsterdam! ;-) That would really be great, I simply miss you guys!

Visiting family

2008-07-04T01:14:00.002+02:00

Sera y yo en el pregón
Originally uploaded by danoliverm

Before I forget again: I'm away for a few days, just as I have been the last two days too ;-) I had been to Cologne to visit my parents together with Jelle and on Friday I will work in the morning and later in the afternoon will fly to Madrid to visit my lilbro Dani and his boyfriend Sera again! Yay! I am soooooo looking forward to see them again, I miss my lilbro and it's always great to see and talk to him personally rather than being in contact electronically ;-)
The trip to Cologne was very nice. I was happy to see my parents again. Unfortunately my mother has some health problems at the moment which also prevented her from joining us on a day trip from Cologne to Papenburg to visit the Meyer yard there which was a birthday present for my dad. So we only went with my dad and my mom stayed at home. It was a great (and very hot) day though and we really enjoyed it.
Today it cooled off after quite some rain and we stayed at home and slept long and chatted, nothing spectacular. But we both - Jelle and I - enjoyed that too.
So on Friday I am going to Madrid to see Dani. Jelle unfortunately has to work again but I was lucky enough to get off. As I said I look very much forward to see my best mate again, my little brother Dani and his Sera.
I wish you all a very nice weekend and see you next week when I hope to post many new pictures to my flickr stream too.

Nice music.

2008-06-30T02:06:00.000+02:00

On another blog I found this video, I liked the music too! ;-)

David Guetta - Delirious.

Good vibes.

2008-06-28T23:32:00.003+02:00

Malú had a free concert this evening in Madrid and from what I heard it sounded like one big and happy party! I noticed regularly now (though I haven't made it personally to one of the concerts yet) that those concerts in Spain are often one big party, everybody happily singing along! It must be such an amazing mood, good vibes. I wonder if this is custom in other contries during concerts too? I'm not such a concert go-er so I can't really tell if that's a spanish phenomena or a typical thing for concerts nowadays...?

Thanks for sharing it tonight, I loved it lilbro! The vibes sounded great and I simply loved to hear you all singing along! Woaah, so great, I truly LOVED it Dani, you're a champ!!! :-D

P.S.: this is my favorite Malú song, it's such a great song and the video is fantastic.

P.P.S.: I am happy.

P.P.P.S.: I really am. :-)